Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

No, not yet. But he's a huge fan of Christmas. I'm hoping when he sees...
- Aah! KUMAR: Go!
I mean, I'm Jesus Christ.
MARY: Oh, my God. Adrian, is that you?
[BOTH LAUGH]
TODD: Harry.
Koreans have killed his mother, and now this tree. Christmas is ruined.
I didn't flunk out of med school. I failed a drug test.
Whoa, why is Vanessa calling you?
What the hell's going on?
Ugh. What did I tell you about using tongue?
MADEA: What was you doing? You supposed to be at school.
And we didn't have the rollback rule...
...because we got precious cargo...
Yeah, you have no fucking idea, dude.
Sorry. I can't help you there.
The tree is removable?
You know, it's kind of better than a window.
Fck!
Is there a...?
It is I, the B-I-G, the B-O-I
This is fucked up.
[GULPS]
Merry Christmas Pancakes are fucking gay
MARIA: Daddy.
...rape my friend on Christmas Eve. He's married.
KUMAR: This is great!
GROW THE FUCK UP NOAHDOESYARNS
Pussy's not like yogurt. It has an expiration date.
Except, see, in our day, it was called Beirut.
Stop, just give me a two-minute break. Aah!
I came downstairs this morning...
What did Vanessa do to suck...
I see what you're doing.
SANTA: Well, I guess...
A couple squeaks got by...
I guard while you kill the power.
Dude, everything's Claymated!
Can we drop this tree off at Sulu's and head to the city?
Or both.
Aah! Okay, I need this room...
That's not helpful!
- We hit this, we win. BORIS: No matter. There's no way...
Maybe if you acted more like an adult, you'd get invited to adult parties.
ANNOUNCER [OVER SPEAKERS]: And now, ladies and gentlemen...
So how do we do this?
That's not good. No.
You guys are too cute.
Please, let me wake up and find a big, beautiful Christmas tree.
- And a DeLorean. - Yes.
[SOBBING]
- Is this a joke? KUMAR: Hold the fuck on.
NARRATOR [ON TV]: Has this ever happened to you?
Yeah.
...of cold out here. Let's get you a nice meal.
[GRUNTING]
Bis, pecs, this one.
They gave my daughter ecstasy.
We got another customer.
Uh-uh.
No. Nobody's dying, Claus. Not on my watch.
You better not pout I'm tellin' you why
Santa, can you hear me?
[GIGGLES]
What about my car?
Fuck it, I'm in.
Oh, nobody dies while Claymated.
...but is that all it takes? - Yes.
You said you were going to...
If it's a baby I gotta give you, it's a baby you're gonna get.
...that handsome man.
No. Hey, no.
Oh, my God. I'm so excited.
Shit!
...35 seconds.
- Ava! Ava! - Shh!
The second the priest...
Thank you. I love you guys.
Make sure we can get the tree, you got a deal.
GUSTAV: Mary would...
And he had pubes.
...the big time!
So hot, NPH.
[IN ENGLISH] Rosetta Stone.
What? No.
Oh, my God. WaffleBot.
Wake up! Wake up!
They sold out months ago.
Just a Christmas tree?
This is like that...
We've been trying for like a... For a year.
- Find the girl, get the tree. Come on. - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
...two reasonable guys...
She...
His name is Seth Goldstein. For Christ's sake!
KUMAR: Oh, shit. - Shit.
Introducing WaffleBot.
...ovulating.
We practiced safe sex.
As they say in my country:
...opportunity to work with you.
Little bit, yeah.
Now we're getting tinkled on.
What?
ADRIAN: Right. Don't talk about it.
Jesus, what a cockblock.
Yo! Idiots!
Yeah, that's why I...
Do you want to come in for a drink...
It's a miracle!
Holy shit. Neil.
...you could say, yes, a Christmas tree is a big deal.
Is it like the scene from A Christmas Story?
Uh, either way, it doesn't matter. Hey, ladies.
I haven '1' heard back. What's going on?
...you'd pull out all the stops too.
Oh, hi there. Somebody's looking...
HAROLD: What the fuck?
We'll drive around till we find the right tree.
You ruined christmas You ruined christmas
HAROLD: My name and your address. That's weird.
We got another one.
You're freaking me out.
Yuri, light them up.