Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Yeah, it does feel good.
No, please don't light us up.
Jesus!
[HAROLD GRUNTS]
I'm sick and tired of your fucking passive-aggressive bullshit.
Hey, are we gonna do this or what?
What about the stuff?
KUMAR: See you, guys. GOLDSTEIN: No, wait.
Oh, yeah!
New Year
Merry Christmas, everyone!
I'm not, it's just hard.
I hate that android fuck.
HAROLD: What? You sold it?
No.
Come on!
After we just had that breakthrough?
johny liver funny clip
Let me tell you a story, Harold.
Forget it. It's past 2 a.m.
- Fucking kill her! - Whoo!
KUMAR: Whoo!
[SNEEZES]
It was really sour.
- What? I don't see any ice. - You've never heard of black ice?
I made a mess.
Oh, yeah? What kind of friend? Best friend?
- It's just urine. It'll wash out. - Oh, Harry.
Fuck topaz
- Oh, right. TODD: Screw you!
I used to date this black chick, she used to queef every time we had sex.
Oh, my God!
...use my pee.
Let's get shots. Keep the party going.
you and I will get the tree.
Because you're the best. I don't wanna go with him.
Wardrobe!
[BABY FARTS AND GIGGLES]
BORIS: Hey, grandpa!
[BOTH LAUGHING]
But that's not enough to be with my Maria.
You seemed tense. I thought we could loosen you up.
Is that Hugo Boss? I love it.
- What? - Never mind. Heh.
Nobody gets high the first time they smoke weed. Don't you know anything?
You are perfectly fine creating a mess...
Tell him I'm not gonna...
Oh. Okay, cool.
[SCOFFS]
KENNETH: Ah, Mr. Lee? I'm here.
That was a really great team effort.
...killing machine leaves.
...right now.
- [WHISPERS] I knew you'd bring that up. - You grabbed me.
[MAN WHIMPERS AND SCREAMS] Oh, no! The water's going down!
...and sees this beautiful tree...
...and sconces than a lifetime of friendship.
What's the deal? Why isn't everybody at school trying to sleep with you?
Oh, nobody dies while stop motion animated.
[YELLING]
[SPEAKS IN RUSSIAN]
Kumar, my friend.
You remind me a lot of that guy...
Yuup
Who are those guys?
I don't wanna...
Look at the branch distribution.
Okay, I'll Skype you later or text you.
Of course. You're doing great. I thought we could work on a thing or two.
Pa rum pum pum pum
You can't celebrate Christmas with a naked tree! It's indecent!
- Oh. - Oh.
Hey...
TODD: Why the I-I...
You take it.
Winter Wonder Weed.
[IN NORMAL VOICE] Oh, fuck me. Fuck. I'm...
Listen, I'd love to stay and chat...
No more jerking off into a sock filled with baby powder.
Okay. Taken.
[DECK THE HALLS PLAYS AS RINGTONE]
Oh.
...a town car, a limo? It's not safe...
Okay? Ha, ha.
Your children threw the party.
...love one of these. - Uh-huh.
...with state-of-the-art 3D technology...
Hello, Harold.
No, it's not! How am I supposed to get a tree now? I'm made of clay.
Where could my baby be? Where's my baby?
You have to be more specific.
Holy shit! Dude, you're stop motion animated!
Sure. Come on in.
Oh No doubt waffle bot!!!
I want to.
...what cocaine can do to the mind of a person as young as you?
This is...
...with your douchey friends and gay-ass sconces.
Welcome to...
Here.
[GRUNTS]
- What do you want for Christmas? KUMAR: That's a really good question.
MARY: Stop resisting.
I hate pancakes.
I need it!
...think I'm okay.
Oh, that's because Maria is...
And they'll burn in H.
Pillow fight in the altar boys' room. Last one there's a rotten egg.
Me and my drum
BECCA: Go! Move!
with you guys.
Whoa. No way!
I want you to find...
Shotgun.
...one-on-one rehearsing later? GRACIE: Wait.
Harold! Wake up! Baby.
Harry? Gotta be kidding me.
- So you killed two trees in one night. KUMAR: Hold on.
- All bad things. - Ah.
What?
NEIL: The chicks were hot. The music was sick.
That's right, I'm gonna get my snozzle.
Lot of poopies, lot of money.
So do you, like, want to see my room?
...kind of thing.
Kumar and WaffleBot friends forever.
Santa Claus is comin'
- NPH? - Yup.