Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

You know, there are other sports besides baseball.

All right. Look, look. Uh-

Johnny Damon You got the sweetest @$$ in the league!

I got some movies just in case you woke up. Not in case you woke up.

like your father has a heart attack or something?

Now, I understand that you're a teacher, right? You were?

What are you doing? You're gonna get arrested.

That part you know. That part everybody knows.

so my Uncle Carl started taking me to Fenway Park.

Ted Williams would roll over in his freezer if he saw this.

Programs here! Get your programs here!

I mean, you just kind of... slinked out of your chair.

What do you think, this is your own private playground?

- Oh, plans? - Yeah, yeah.

Yeah. I don't have it with me, but I can remember it.

- I have- I don't know. - Or do you think they're gonna promote from within?

- What other guy? - It's October.

Maybe you should date a different kind of guy.

Al should know. He was there actually. He's 136 years old.

I don't really know much about it.

I’d say jam on, sex, and breathing

He is. I love him. He's a doll.

The work you did for us was brilliant.

Oh, shit. Who is it?

Your Uncle Carl saw 3,000 games from these seats.

The hours would be better. You get summers free. It's so much less competitive.

And it's very important to him every-

Well, thank you.

catches one in the eye at 22, he's finished at 26.

Dana Donato, you’ve got the best ass in Sunday League!

That's right. I'm-

- Well, you were lined up wrong. - I wasn't lined up, I-

But there's a reason why she's 30 and not married.

- And that teacher's here with those kids. - What?

19-8. Good God.

- I gotta go. - Guess what Chris is doing right now.

And I won't feel guilty for having to do my job.

Seven years in a row now, we finish with our faces in their butts.

Sitting there doing her homework.

Do you believe in this? "The Curse of the Bambino"?

There's nothing left to throw up, I promise.

Yeah, see, that joke's not fun for me.

I lost 200 pounds. I had my stomach stapled shut.

- Yeah. - I like being part of something that's bigger than me-than I.

He looks great for his age. 1919, their miserable, greedy pig of a boss...

She's at his place. He's in the shower.

And sometimes...

I have season tickets to Fenway Park. I haven't missed a game in 11 years.

- You got the promotion. - No, no.

Uh, a group of us, um, just had this work thing...

- Yeah. Exactly. - God, those women are so pathetic.

She took her heels off.

- Really? - Yeah, you can fool everyone for a while, you know?

- She had insurance for that. - Attention, morons.

- Okay. - Hello?

The heart and soul of Boston, Fenway Park.

Here, I got it.

Because maybe that's something I've been lacking in my life.

It was actually very ladylike.

You should see the way my sister's husband dresses.

- Good luck. - Way to go, Mr. W.

Number eight: I like sometimes you talk out of the side of your mouth a little bit.

Oh, that's great. That's great. Pile it on. Yeah.

when that happens-

Wait, wait. We're not breaking up, are we?

I'm the luckiest man on the face of the Earth.

- Robin and Chris. - Welcome aboard.

You can either hit a curveball or you can't.

- The ones from earlier today. - Oh. Yeah.

And, "Doctor, induce labor because the Oakland A's are coming in tomorrow. "

- You forgot my last name. - No, I just blanked.

This is a real family. This is the family that's here for you.

- I am the Red Sox. - You're not the Red Sox.

Thanks, man. I owe you one.

You had nothing to do with it. I just suddenly had a whim...

I don't know. Well, yeah, yeah.

Yes, until summer.

Okay. You betcha. Bye-bye.

and a little size-one Red Sox jersey...

Tony C., best young player in baseball...

We're only on May. We've been here for four hours. Let's try to speed this up.

Took a sick day.

Nothin', you know.

LETS GET SOME FUCKING RUNS

Audrey, I'm very sorry, but you can have our home game. Don, what does she win?

You can't fake it. Anything else in life, you don't have to be great in-

Oh, the schoolteacher.