Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

When your husband is bringing his brother to Alaska and is excited to show him a good time, but you know he doesn’t like any of that shit

Really? Because that's not what I heard. That is not okay.

Dude, one man to another. I got you on this.

you put some of the stuffing in the wrong places

A cushy, $38,000-a-year branch manager

Go on, spark it up.

How great is this? The four of us out to dinner.

Screw you, pal. I belong to John Bennett.

We better start doing stupid shit.

A professional NFL player is called upon to save the world.

He rocks his I ROC Z, he rocks it well

Po Po Po Po Power with BEARGLOVE!!!

Yeah But You Have No Skills

Ow! Fuck! Cocksucker!

Teddy rux hecking pin

How long have we been saying we were going to...

I fucked her with a parsnip last week

I'm just trying to find a way to keep you both in my life.

and beat up the Jewish kids.

Candy better be alive you sick bitch

Look, the point is, you're blaming me

yeah what ever thanks for pearl harbor

LOOK AT ALL THISE VAGINAESBOBOBOOOOS LET ME FUCK YAYASYAYAYAYAYAYA

Let's all be best friends.

Get lost, Bennett!

My dick is squished by the TV.

Hey there, fella. How are you?

The Save-Ums! Reboot (2030) Coming Soon In

I have to say, I've been following you ever since I was a young boy

Look, I'm only saying this because I love you.

fuck shit bitch ass penis cock cunt cocksucker motherfucker tits pussy damn and more swears

Huh? Meat hole? What?

most wonderful thing I'd ever seen. Ever.

Teddy-Rux-Fucking-pin

with some people at my apartment.

Tom Brady could do that. Tom Brady could do that!

Besides, what if he chose Ted?

Are you sure you want to Spartans Tonight We Die In Hell? If You Spartans Tonight We Die in Hell Now. Tap Continue to restart at this level.

You're my best friend, Sam.

Just grab your thunder buddy And say these magic words

Just give me the car keys.

This is the theme song from the movie Octopussy.

Where's my ring, motherfucker? Stop it. Come on!

Okay, now you count to 100, and then you try to find me, okay?

I told him to bail on you that night at Rex's and he said, "No."

He thought ALF was Jewish for some reason.

NARRATOR: John became instantly attached to Teddy.

(DOORBELL RINGING)

Just to be clear, I'm not embarrassed.

Ted, you mean everything to me, and so does Lori.

Fucking kill yourself bearglove you fucking cunt!

Is that a shit?

Illumination! Yeah illumination!

Encesta Karem!... Encesta Karem!...

(LAUGHING) Right? Yeah, she gets it.

You can't get me, thunder 'Cause you're just God's farts

Po Po Po Po Power with BEARGLOVE!!!

there is a shit on my floor!

I’ll pick you up at 8:00.

I have so much teddy bear paperwork I have to get to, it is sick.

Why, what's going on?

Po Po Po Po Power with Bearglove

Illumination! Illumination!?!?!

Po Po Po Po Power with Bearglove

eventually, nobody gives a shit.

Po Po Po Po Power with Bearglove

Jb byride How do you drive in a Taco Bell hand dryer you're grounded grounded grounded grounded grounded grounded ground

I Don’t Have To. I’m A Freaking Teddy Bear.

Johnny. It's me.

merry christmas you fucking whore! now lets fucking fuck you bitches!

Come on, I do not sound that much like Peter Griffin.

She's making you do it, isn't she?

But I made friends in the line.

Dude, I got 10 minutes. Where's Flash Gordon?

(JOHN SOBBING) Why are you crying?

Are you okay? (GROANING)

why the fuck would she say that

I'd chew it off to get you free.

Fuck you, Shoreman!

Hey Teddy Bear Are You? Are You All Right?

Look, I'm going to cut the shit, here.

Whoa, whoa! Stop, stop! That's them, turn around!

Fine, John, but this is, I swear to God, your last chance.

Teddy Rux-fucking-pin

No, that doesn't work.

Okay. You hide first.

This bullshit! This all bullshit!

I'm guessing you're more of a "wooden horse with a wig" kind of family.

Son of a bitch!

Are you kidding me?

You coming down?

I will, sir, I promise.

The night we met.

(BRAKES SCREECHING)

but I don't want you to do that.

Because of that, I just lost the love of my life.

Why did Mario helps Steven future saved the day

By the power vested in me

Did the whole place for $47.

I'm not going to wait any longer for my life to start.

Oh, jeez, here we go.

LORI: All right, here we go.

has an extremely broad definition.

I gotta cut out for a bit.

Shit, I got to get to work!

Yeah, I'm guessing you guys don't have a PS3.

Tundra buddies for life

Oh, man. Here, let me get you some ice.

Po Po Po Po Power with Tigerclaw

(MOUTHING) Tom Skerritt! Wow!

You were just wonderful.

Ted and Tami-Lynn continued their torrid love affair for quite some time.

that's a weird fucking question

That must have slipped through the cracks.

Po Po Po Po Power with Bearglove

after you insult the admiral Im promoting you

I GOT FUCKING WASTED LAST NIGHT.

Just like in the movie.

This is the American fantasy, right here.

I guess Santa paid attention to how good you were this year, huh?

Po Po Po Po Power with Bearglove

Oh, my God! He's going to jump! Get closer.

Po Po Po Po Power with Bearglove

Po Po Po Po Power with Bearglove

These were John Lennon's glasses.

I'm with Lori here. I'm already on probation.

Now, I have to give you an ouch.

TED: That's my bad. I was sending a tweet.

Po Po Po Po Power with BEARGLOVE!!!

Po Po Po Po Power with Bearglove

Please play nice.

and this is Patty Peterson.

while singing some creepy Victorian nursery rhyme.

Do I need to wash my hands before I play this game?

John, I need a man. Not a little boy with a teddy bear.

What's your opinion on The Boys? My opinion: It's awesome

Lori, wait, please.

John, I look like something you give your kid

You're my best friend, John.

the boys sucks! final destination rocks!

Ow! I hate that word!

To NoahDoesYARNS: If your parents could see you now, they would be so disappointed in you. If you hate your haters so much, then come at me, wimp! Do your worst! From your worst nightmare: LouisTheMan

That's a nice fucking example you're setting...

I know what you did with Ted wasn't easy,

I don't give a shit because is 2 $99 you ask me I say no.

and he couldn't wait to tell everyone the good news.

NARRATOR: John was just about the happiest boy in the world

Tell him we said…

Really? Well, isn't that exciting.

You know what? I don't feel like talking to you about this.

Look what Israel did! Look what Israel did! Look what Israel did!

Come on, Robert.

So, talk to me, Johnny Quest. How are things with you and Lori?

Old Tom Brady could do that. Old Tom Brady COULD do that

Is that a Flash Gordon ray gun,

For God's sakes.

Teddy-Rux-Fucking-pin

But I'm talking about a mature relationship, Lori.

"Or is the floor on the shit?" is what Kierkegaard would say.