Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

People didn't even have sex anymore.

AKEEM: Hello, Babar.

Acting mine, that's good.

Uh, what's-what's, uh... umbajuntoo?

Princesses can be written off just as much as anyone.

America has certainly changed since our last visit.

your soft ass ain't never do nothing like that.

I got to get solid.

I can't do this shit no more, man. I really can't.

- Put your shoulders back. - Mm-hmm.

♪ To be loved... ♪

I shall wait here.

if you were in the mood...

when you make love, you need a flashlight.

This happened before we even met.

- (grunting) - (rhythmic drumming)

Well, there was a small off-campus library.

Mm, a makeover.

Uh, Lisa, I was, uh, wondering,

♪ Hey, hey ♪

- (Mary hollering) - LAVELLE: That's her song.

for locating one of your lost sperm.

and then we can, you know, get it crackin'.

uh, remakes and-and sequels to old movies nobody asked for?

♪ We got the moves ♪

♪ What's even the point? ♪

This the best house of God we could find

We will teach you how to walk like a prince.

So, uh... marriage.

LIVIA: Do the right thing. Go ahead, boy.

- Oh? - (chuckles)

Which reminds me... St. John's is at the Garden.

the universe began.

Get that stupid look off your face.

- What was that line? - (laughter)

Everything that I have done for him,

Children, I would love for you to meet your brother.

Here, in this hall,

I only recently discov... (laughing)

(quiet, indistinct chatter)

And heavy lies the head that wears the crown.

(entry bell jingles)

All right, we gonna take this old-school now, okay?

(drum and bass play one beat)

and sexist men of the cloth

Yes, Your Majesty.

I will be your royal groomer.

I think they get the idea. So, how you doing?

It's rush hour surge pricing.

to solve your problems diplomatically.

- Nonsense. - (Izzi chuckles)

I shall bring Queens to Zamunda!

I'm not hopping on some plane,

Ah, well, I don't want to shift blame,

Gentlemen, I have no time for this.

I am Uncle Reem's friend.

Akeem now is an African king.

I am King Akeem Joffer, king of Zamunda.

(thunder crashes)

And because she's a woman,

♪ And we tight just like birds of a feather ♪

Y'all leaving? Does that mean "leave"?

♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey-hey ♪

Thank you for your kind words.

- Jabberwocky Joffer. - No.

I'm going to die now.

They got a seven-foot-five center.

Good morning, Mother and Father, and happy anniversary.

- ♪ From Zamunda ♪ - ♪ Ooh ♪

Take me to the Church of the Holy Jubilation.

LAVELLE: Why not? I got sales experience.

Yeah, but that's not Barbershop.

She is still the mother of my son.

♪ I got Sexual Chocolate with me ♪

("We Got the Moves" by Beau Young Prince playing)

It is so good to see you.

"Pack-a-quando," "Pack-a-mondo."

until King Akeem gives me my answer.

Hey, Mary, you just gonna leave?

The McDowell's menu is in no way

I did not exactly lie to you.

More like a crack house of God.

I think he was supposed to be, like,

- Prince Lavelle. - General Izzi.

Now it's time for the main event, young folks.

Well, no one is asking you to stay.

JAFFE JOFFER (over TV): This is ZNN.

The royal artist made a sketch of my vision.

You don't have to suck up to me anymore.

grazing in a field of horny goat weeds.

That's Italian for "mack daddy mentor."

I rather enjoyed being on fleek.

Two shots of chilled Cîroc.

I must say, you are more like your father than I thought.

♪ Said he's going up ♪

I could not stop. They are coming.

So, you still got that smooth... scepter? (chuckles)

Go to hell, you Western weasel!

and now she's gone.

- Ew. - Joffer Joffer.

of trimming your most precious hairs.

LAVELLE: Hey! Come on, y'all!

I'll be dead soon.

here in this land, conceived during my last visit.

(Mirembe laughing)

Hey, you know something?

does it concern my marriage to a suitor

His death would make me smile.

You need no other teacher than your king and your father.

why these mashed potatoes is black?

I know I look good.

when the trapper spawns right in front of me

- Oh, you'll see. - REEM: Okay, I want y'all

to find his true love.

Perhaps you two should get to know each other a little better.

- You know? - MARY: Let me tell you something, baby.

These are the foreskins of your forefathers.

It shall be glorious.

to win the heart of his true love,

According to our ZNN source inside the palace,

And as far as Zamundan royalty is concerned,

Good morning, Tinashe.

came to be with a single purpose:

when you assume that Semmi had something to do with this.

and cut your own damn hair from now on.

- ♪ Going up to that great ♪ - Remember what I told you.

The monkey said, "Hey, you bastard, can't you see?

to take care of you.

I give you Fresh Peaches and Sugar Cube!

My son has returned to Queens.

- Uppity bitch say what? - What?

Your neighborhood seems to be thriving.

Mm, Lisa, please. I'm getting it from everywhere.

Uh, he's the reason why the Zamundans migrated