Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Congratulations, we're making you Sergeant

No luck catching them set times then?

Gun fights. Car chases. Proper action and shit.

Want anything from the shop?

She tripped and fell on her own shears.

It was more about me being obsessed with the job.

That is nothing, man.

Leslie Tiller was fucking murdered

I know, I'm outside.

He'll Be Having Nightmares For A While

- Yours, isn't it? - I won it for you.

I’ve had my top off in this layby tits!

Quite appalling.

Well, I haven't held a razor for over two years, and I'd quite like to keep it that way

- We? - Come on, partner. Let's go to work.

oh it smells like you just did a fartuction! yes and it smells like doves!

What's it like getting paid?

unless you can back them up with hard evidence.

If there's anything you need, just let us know.

Yeah, people do yoga all the time. What makes you think it was murder?

Hey, that’s us!

You do realize that window was broken from the inside?

the truth is far less complex.

He's appointed himself judge, jury, and executioner

I’d say that’s lunch

BECAUSE THEY'RE FUCK UGLY

Yes, but you were already married to the force, weren't you?

Leslie Tiller Was Fucking Murdered!

Any Luck updating those reports then?

and righteous and for the good of humankind.

Joyce will discover the Sergeant lying on the wet floor of his bathroom,

Its needs are simple.

Hello Nicholas, how's the hand?

now unvanquish dantalien! mejw jdjvkej kdo oiru ooooeupu jekcskkcwkck ksos k

No luck catching them Jeks, then? It's just the one Jek, actually...

It was the single most painful experience of my life.

They listed his age as 35. When I'm actually 33.

He shot a crack head with a Kalashnikov.

Seen any murderings, Nicholarse?

If we don't come down hard on these clowns...

Good work, everyone.

You ever fire your gun up in the air and gone "ahhhh?"

I say we go in through the front entrance, take the place aisle by aisle.

I chased a suspect from the scene. Innocent people don't run!

It's a well known fact that the church roof is in dire need of repair.

What do you mean by "this one"?

You are pulling my leg?

Well, there's nothing going on, is there?

- What's the matter? You got brain-freeze? - No, I got brainwave.

Go back to Lon-don

- You what? - No, apparently it's been deactivated. Over.

That's a nice looking mac Check out it's ports

- Why have you got your stab vest on? - It's a requirement.

Maybe, it’s time to give it up sir

Everything's gonna be fine.

You ain't seen Bad Boys II?

We're actually meant to say 'deceased' now Official vocab guidelines state that 'dead' is too aggressive

It can get awfully hairy out there.

Nicholas, my son.

I must be stopped

Quickly established an effectiveness and popularity within the community.

Take our minds off of it.

I may not be a man of God, Reverend, but I know right, and I know wrong,

Nice one Doris, nuttin’ like a bit of girl on girl

Detective Sergeant Wainwright and Detective Constable Cartwright.

What are you up to tonight? I have to water my peace lily

They listed his age as 25 When he's actually 23

That is SLt Simon Cullen

- Right. Then where are you living? - He's staying at the Section House, sir.

Really? How so?

Pint of lager please, mary

Because he’s fuck ugly.

No, listen. Wait, wait, wait, Michael, wait, listen to me. Listen, listen.

And anyway, what makes you think I could dislodge part of the church roof?

Why does she look like a vampire? Because she is one?

he isn't even from round here

He does for this one.

- Are you saying that this is a crime scene? - Yes, sir, I am.

Academically excelled in theoretical course work and final year examinations.

No luck seeing them colours then its just the one colour actually

GET ON THE FLOOR NOW!! BECAUSE IF YOU DON'T I'LL SPANK YOU

- And Martin Blower? - No, actually.

And yet we respond by not taking a single punitive measure?

Crusty jugglers

What absolute horseshit.

Actually, I just wanted to ask, "What's your perfect Mass Effect?"

belonging to Leslie, that I intend to turn it into a memorial garden, in her honor.

Apart from the summer of 1979 when I wanted to be Kermit the Frog.

- George Merchant. - Self-made millionaire.

PACK IT IN TRUMP YOU SILLY BASTARD

Displayed great aptitude in field exercises.

This notebook has saved my skin more times than I care to mention.

No luck finding them RCGs then Its just the one RCG actually

- Excuse me? - Oh, I'm sorry.

What's the situation One analyst and a fuck load of slides

From that moment on, I swore that I would do her proud.

Traffic Collision

My my, here come the Europeans

I'm just calling with details of your accommodation.

Because he's fuck ugly.

I haven't really got that much family round here, save for Cousin Sissy.

Actually, I did notice some minor graffiti on the fountain.

No luck catching them pigs then?

knew where the new bypass road is going

There hasn't been a recorded murder in Sandford for 20 years.

I'm not jumping into anyone's grave.

That Sargeant Angel's back. Check out his ports.

No luck catching them Labour voters yet? Just the one voter actually.

It's all right, it's all right. There's nothing to see.

Happy birthday to you.

d'ni real cases real people judge judy the letter t climb climb it till you reach the tower antwerp when 900 years old you reach if it's good or not huh those stories tonight on 60 minutes

No luck catchin' them shooters then... It's just the one shooter actually.

We're actually supposed to call it "the service" now. 00:06:06 Official vocab guidelines state that "force" is too aggressive.

- What about Dad? - He'll come round again.

You think this is sufficient reason to travel at 48 in a 30 zone?

When's your Birtday, Mark Cargill? Eighteenth of April, 1969.

yes beryl bflankerette? what do you want? i want to do some shappiyapping in taishan.

No luck sparking world war three then?

Do you know this man?

Yeah he’s auntie Jackie’s sister’s brother’s boy

Oh, he'll be in bits tomorrow.

It’s not your office anymore.

I'll make sure everyone gets their just deserts.

Another cranberry juice?

Well then you're packed already

Maybe they were all accidents. People have accidents every day.

Sandford's most wanted.

- I'll have a pint of lager, please. - Yeah, Roy.

and discovered that I should be in the pub.

Yeah, accidents happen all the time. What makes you think it was murder?

Seems like Mr. Merchant tried to have a little fry up and left the gas on.

What the fuck is he on about?

Ten times what George Merchant and Martin Blower, God rest them, offered me.

Officers, arrest that man.

Police work is not about proper action or shit.

Is there now? Twenty-nine.

In Sandford, Gloucestershire.

What Absolute Horseshit

but as far as I'm concerned, Cousin Sissy can go and fuck...

Oh, he's got shorts on.

You want me to get the Chief Autistic to come all the way down here?

What absolute Horse shit

Couldn't see his face, could I? I'm not made of eyes.

Here to announce the winners is the newest addition to the Sandford Police Force.

Somebody call the police!

Anything to energize my workforce.

You want me to bother the Chief Inspector with this?

Have you ever fired your gun up in the air and gone "aahh!"?

Grindlewald’s inner circle revealed...

Not least those heathens at Buford Abbey.

Doesn't it seem a little strange that Martin Blower would lose control of his car

WHAT THE FUCK IS HE ON ABOUT

A pleasure, my liege.

What’s your name? Arin A. Arinson.

I have a forensic degree you know

I am sure that all of you will have noticed the return of a blight to our streets.

and of Eve Draper and Martin Blower on April 28th.

Work events happen all the time what makes you think it’s a party Because I was there

Spot of bother up at Ellroy Farm.

For the first time in my life, you know, I'm glad.

Now, I know what you're going to say,