Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Yeah.
Your Honor, in light of the fact that this is the defendant's first major offense,
Patient?
Hey, listen to me, Jeff.
You're the one that put me through law school.
Do you know what that's about? Yeah.
You're a wonderful man, Grandpa.
The honorable Francis Rayford presiding.
and I tell you, I can't find five people out there
Arthur, the committee is doing something about what's going on.
I've been a lawyer for 12 years.
[WARREN & JAY LAUGHING]
on people's lives. Wait a minute.
Look at that. Ha, ha, ha.
GAIL: Jesus. Sounds pretty bad.
Hi, Mr. Kirkland. Nice to see you. ARTHUR: How are you today?
I can't get anything from anybody. I'll see you later.
[CHATTER ON POLICE RADIO]
No, sir, I'm not trying to make a deal.
Sam, I love you.
Well, now we know they're definitely safe.
Put that thing away. What's going on?
Any other judge would have let you out, but this guy,
You're gonna find yourself representing a sacrificial lamb.
No, he doesn't drink. Doesn't drink at all.
Because during sex,
[SIGHS]
I'm aware that I'm not particularly, uh, well-liked.
Centerfold. Lawyer of the Month.
Hi. Hi, Sherry.
And ladies and gentlemen of the jury,
Nothing. I don't have to do anything.
A defense lawyer has to defend people who are guilty.
She lets go of that purse, I'm on my way.
Make sure the judge sees it, okay?
Uh, I'm Arthur Kirkland. You wanted to see me?
Do you honestly think that...?
Well, you mean, we're not gonna make it back?
RAYFORD: Mr. Kirkland, you are out of order.
PRISONER 3: Don't put that in here. Chick ain't my type.
I mean, we are so opposite,
RAYFORD: Here, let me show you something.
Got anything to say?
[CHUCKLES]
How are you? Good to see you.
SALTZMAN: What kind of world do we live in?
What the hell are you doing?
Will you take a lie-detector test?
GUARD 2: Come on, Kirkland. Let's go.
Firemen trying to get me out of the car. I'm trapped because some son...
because you hate him so much, right?
[PEOPLE LAUGHING]
So he pleads guilty even though he's innocent.
Mr. Kirkland...
The son of a bitch is guilty!
Sweetheart, give him the pictures.
What are you doing, judge? Jerking me off, here?
Will the defendant please rise?
from a lot of corrupt lawyers, is what we're doing.
Were you in love? No.
To say, you know... To wave to her, to say hello.
Anything I tell you, you know?
[SCREAMS]
And other stuff too.
wanted in Alabama for assault with a deadly weapon.
Why me, fellas? Come on.
Tell you the punchline. You're gonna love this.
What about this guy here?
Now, sit down. I've got a lot of work to do.
Why would she lie?
You know what I mean?
And I fully intend to have that proven in a court of law.
[ALL LAUGHING]
No. Not at all.
Why don't you ease up on the judge?
RAYFORD: Order in the courtroom. BAILIFF: Do what I say.
I just borrowed it for the night, and now how am I gonna tell him?
[WOMAN SCREAMS]
I know that. That's right.
Don't quote the law. My client is innocent.
I find the defendant, Ronald Wenke, guilty.
But this is crazy, you know? I know it. I know it.
Mr. Kirkland. Damn it, Arthur!
The judge is guilty Wait a minute.
We're not going after anyone, Mr. Kirkland. We are simply...
That's not the point.
If he's allowed to go free,
Okay.
Arthur, you're talking crazy now. You don't know he's guilty.
[COUGHS]
Only it's not that simple.
Nothing can be done. Now, I don't buy that, judge.
Last week, we went for a ride in the car. Remember?
With you, it's still new and exciting.
I'm placing you on probation for one year.
He pushes me aside,
No.
[WARREN & JAY LAUGHING]
How'd you know there was one, Ralph?
Why? Polygraph is not admissible evidence.
Oh, they're just having some fun with him, that's all.
Your Honor, Mr. Foreman,
Let's just get you to the hospital, get you checked out.
Are you sure I had my teeth this morning?
He forgot to bring it.
Fleming got me crazy. You push Fleming
On the basis of this report,
I don't pretend to be a voice of authority.
[LAUGHS]
[BOTH LAUGHING]
Arthur... Gail, on my life?
He's all right. He just needs a little time, that's all.
Here. No, wait, wait, wait.
Oh, I see. Yeah, yeah.
So, uh, what's new? Heh, heh.
You say, Pass the salt.
who are willing to believe that I'm innocent. Not five of them.
I mean, he killed kids. You see?
Arthur.
And he was too busy.
Hang somebody for armed robbery. Try it.
I said, Oh. Sounded like, Go.
It depends. He comes, he goes.
Now, that's true, because I don't.