Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Fascist... dictator.

Everyone is getting quiet.

Once you have them laughing, then you hit them for money. Simple.

Ah, Nancy. You may call me Fielding.

Any idea how many you can put out a year?

Hey, Ralph, how much is a copy of Orgasm?

And on the back wall, you'll notice there's a handle for each arm.

When I was younger, I used to sleep with an electric blanket

We'll find the rebels.

You'd better get some rest, Luis. You're beginning to talk gibberish.

Back, back, back.

It is in all the newspapers.

Vargas cares very little for diplomatic procedures, my friend.

I will shut down the newspapers. I will train my soldiers.

It's... metaphysical and redundant.

- What do you do? - Suck out the poison.

That's a real idiot's job.

Go. Gesundheit.

No, it has nothing to do with the fact that you're short,

You have a chance to die for freedom.

He might lose the patient. You know Fielding.

Excuse me. Excuse me, sir.

I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I've known Fielding Mellish for years,

We have nothing to worry about them.

of torturing hundreds of women and children.

Erm... (CLEARS THROAT)

Gentlemen, the Exec-usiser.

- What? Tell me what's the matter. - No, nothing.

A boy. He... He was really... No, he was really nothing like you.

It's not my personality. Do you have fun when you're with me?

I'll have the grapefruit sections, two poached eggs,

I got bitten by a snake! Help!

To a guy like me, the greatest crimes are the crimes against human dignity.

You gotta be smart to be a president. Let me be vice-president.

Well, then maybe it's my fault.

FIELDING: I have a confession to make. NANCY: What, love?

Have you seen X-rays of me?

We'll probably have a videotape replay of that later on.

Nor do I. He made cuffs in my pants.

I mean, he's not the worst I've had. Not the best, but not the worst.

- To a country called San Marcos. - I've never heard of it, dear.

This whole thing smacks of conspiracy, if you ask me.

What's the matter? You look glassy-eyed.

- I know, but they have common sense. - I am the ruler of this country.

(CHUCKLES) Oh...

Every day we gotta hear this.

General, a word from you, if you will, sir, for our viewers.

- Is it personality or looks? - Well, no.

And the National Rifle Association declares death a good thing.

Do the best you can.

Good evening. I'm Roger Grimsby with the news at six.

then I have made a deal for reinforcements with the UJA.

Well, good luck to you, sir. Good luck to you.

And, er... let's see, Newsweek.

I've been training very hard for this, and I just gave a hundred per cent.

I am sure you understand that.

- OK. It was nice to meet you. - Nice meeting you, too.

of this career of yours.

(SHOUTING AND JEERING)

- Nurse. - Listen to me.

The doctor comes in to examine the cut.

- Hi, Mum. Hi, Dad. - Fielding.

And it has nothing to do with the fact that your teeth are in bad shape.

Listen to me, son. You can do this. You can be a fine surgeon.

And why are we here and everything. You like Chinese food?

If we can get it in the office, we can get it in the armed forces.