Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

It's called a post-nuptial agreement.

I want it stated for the record that I'm a good mother. Do you hear me?

We threw it away when I was little.

And while most would spend the day practicing their sports,

Wasn't there a plumber? Your mother said you were in love with a plumber.

If you don't sign it,

- It was an accident. - Porter, I warned you.

Oh, God! Are you all right?!

There's a secret bank account in the Cayman Islands that no longer exists?

Well... It's nice meeting you anyway, Mike.

If she moves in, she will burn up all my oxygen and I need it.

- Was he looking for weed or money? - Who knows at this point?

oh boy a spanking across mommy's knees! yay!

Most men would leave over something like that.

I know you're lying to me, OK? I know that you're lying.

That's why he wanted me to come in first.

My mom used to beat the hell out of my sisters and me,

I'm making him this care package. He'll know that I'm thinking about him.

- Are you sure? - Yeah, I'm fine.

Hey. What's the deal with this chest, anyway?

You're not tired. You took a nap. What is it?

- You didn't? - No.

Susan's always telling me how much fun you have.

Wait a few minutes and I'll give you one, OK?

- Oh, have we met? - Yes, Mrs. Solis. We've met.

Obviously you haven't missed much.

Well, uh, sort of. Andrew's waiting inside but, uh...

that's it, I'm dead to them.