Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

...or Christmas, or whatever the **** it is.
JOHN: There she is. Wabasha.
You, know, Christmas Eve. Around 9:00.
Looks like Jerry’s Been enjoying a “different”
You know damn well I throw back what I'm not gonna eat.
What are you talking about?
Hi, John.
- Oh, yeah. - Uh-huh?
[HORN HONKING]
Wax worms are 75 cents.
Me? Mmm...
- Schneider. - Snyder.
Boy, he sure wasn't pleased about modeling in the nude.
- All right. 1 937, at Todd Field... - Oh, for God's sake.
He's dead.
Mm-mm-mm.
[BOTH LAUGH]
- Oh, Max, you're the greatest. MAX: Thank you.
The Green Hornet's caught more fish than you've lied about, Gustafson.
[ICE CRACKING]
And I also know that the only things in life that you regret...
- Come here. Come on. - I'm not apologizing to anybody.
- Merry Christmas. - Merry Christmas.
It's not even Thanksgiving, and here we are enjoying our lovely fall weather.
- Some game last night. MAX: Double overtime.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
- Okay, here we go. - Oh, wow!
Oh, and John...
Oh, sure, you were with the guys at the VFW.
...you'd be advised to stay inside and have yourself...
Uh, Jacob? JACOB: Yeah?
You have a whole library up there from what I could see.
Here's your mail.
Oh, my God, is that familiar. Your mother wondered where I was for 20 years.
Do you paint?
Medication?
Very. She also looks to still be married.
It's a perfectly legitimate question.
Our first number is a...
And I'll lay 8-to-5 you can't get it up the entire honeymoon.
And if anybody says otherwise they're damn liars.
Brrr
Hey. Where's Santa's favorite little girl, huh?
- Don't shout. - I'm not shouting.
I'd rather kiss a dead moose's butt.
Now stay tuned for tonight's $6.4 million jackpot on Powerball.
How are you gonna support her when the IRS takes your house away?
...and I was just wondering if I might use your bathroom.
So how you been?
[ALL CHATTERING]
Ah, the little girl is Alexandra, my granddaughter.
[JOHN GRUNTS]
[DOOR CLOSES]
[BOTH LAUGHING]
[MELANIE LAUGHING]
[OPERA MUSIC PLAYING]
...they go by pretty fast. - Ha, ha. Yeah?
It's not worth the effort.
Yeah, I think it's exciting to experience new things...
JOHN: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[MUTTERING]
It's no use pretending this isn't happening, Mr. Gustafson.
and I'll lay 8 to 5 you can't get it up the entire honeymoon
MAN: Marker.
No, I'm sure John started every fight since 1 940.
We're having a heat wave here.
- So? - So, what's going on?
It would make the whole thing worthwhile.
When I had my ulcers, I was...
- I'm not nervous, schmuck. - Don't call me a schmuck, you putz.
Hey, Jacob, you got my vote. That's terrific.
Oh shut up, fat-ass!
[ARIEL & MAX SHOUTING]
You could be our next millionaire.
[LAUGHS]
- Moron. - Putz.
Hey, Pop.
Dad.
I think Barry did that on purpose!
[HORN HONKS]
...egg-sucker Mitch Mullin? - Oh.
[GROANS]
[GROANING]
- A 25. - Seven...
Lucky bastard.
- Son of a... - Jealous?
MOVER 3: This up front? MOVER 4: Yeah.
ARIEL: Well, it's my inspiration. - You did...? You're an artist?
[LAUGHING]
- Beautiful day, Mr. Goldman! - Hey, Snyder.
...and all you can do is shout at me. - Wait.
Ah, well, I had all of this stuff that I had to get taken care of. I, uh...
Oh! Grandpa!
Can I put Allie in your bed?
What do I know? I'm 68-year-old man. I got no house, no wife, no pension.
I know.
Honey, marriage isn't easy, you know. You gotta work at it.
Up yours, Gustafson.
Oh, are those for me?
It's a gift.
...they expect me every Thanksgiving.
I'm asking you to accompany me to my office.
Uh, Dad? I'll be damned if I can find a bottle opener.
- He's in. - He's in.
Enjoy your shower, smartass?
Yeah...
- '38. - Well, it's ridiculous.
Look at all the crap you... Excuse me. The stuff you got here.
[SNYDER GRUNTING]
It looks like Bry is taking the skinboat to tuna town.