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Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips
What are you talking about?
Enjoy your shower, smartass?
[LAUGHS]
[DOOR CLOSES]
Boy, he sure wasn't pleased about modeling in the nude.
Brrr
JOHN: There she is. Wabasha.
[ALL CHATTERING]
...or Christmas, or whatever the **** it is.
It would make the whole thing worthwhile.
[ARIEL & MAX SHOUTING]
Lucky bastard.
- Merry Christmas. - Merry Christmas.
It's not worth the effort.
Oh, are those for me?
Honey, marriage isn't easy, you know. You gotta work at it.
[ICE CRACKING]
And I'll lay 8-to-5 you can't get it up the entire honeymoon.
- A 25. - Seven...
Oh! Grandpa!
Mm-mm-mm.
[LAUGHING]
It's a gift.
- '38. - Well, it's ridiculous.
Medication?
You, know, Christmas Eve. Around 9:00.
...and I was just wondering if I might use your bathroom.
Hey. Where's Santa's favorite little girl, huh?
You know damn well I throw back what I'm not gonna eat.
I know.
- Don't shout. - I'm not shouting.
[BOTH LAUGHING]
JOHN: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- All right. 1 937, at Todd Field... - Oh, for God's sake.
Uh, Dad? I'll be damned if I can find a bottle opener.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
- Come here. Come on. - I'm not apologizing to anybody.
- Oh, Max, you're the greatest. MAX: Thank you.
Yeah, I think it's exciting to experience new things...
What do I know? I'm 68-year-old man. I got no house, no wife, no pension.
It looks like Bry is taking the skinboat to tuna town.
[BOTH LAUGH]
MOVER 3: This up front? MOVER 4: Yeah.
I think Barry did that on purpose!
...they go by pretty fast. - Ha, ha. Yeah?
[GROANING]
No, I'm sure John started every fight since 1 940.
Wax worms are 75 cents.
How are you gonna support her when the IRS takes your house away?
Oh, my God, is that familiar. Your mother wondered where I was for 20 years.
[HORN HONKING]
Oh, sure, you were with the guys at the VFW.
You could be our next millionaire.
And I also know that the only things in life that you regret...
Dad.
...they expect me every Thanksgiving.
Look at all the crap you... Excuse me. The stuff you got here.
It's no use pretending this isn't happening, Mr. Gustafson.
Our first number is a...
Oh, and John...
- Beautiful day, Mr. Goldman! - Hey, Snyder.
Do you paint?
Ah, the little girl is Alexandra, my granddaughter.
- Schneider. - Snyder.
[MELANIE LAUGHING]
Here's your mail.
You have a whole library up there from what I could see.
Up yours, Gustafson.
- I'm not nervous, schmuck. - Don't call me a schmuck, you putz.
- Moron. - Putz.
Me? Mmm...
[HORN HONKS]
I'm asking you to accompany me to my office.
- So? - So, what's going on?
[GROANS]
Yeah...
It's a perfectly legitimate question.
...egg-sucker Mitch Mullin? - Oh.
and I'll lay 8 to 5 you can't get it up the entire honeymoon
Uh, Jacob? JACOB: Yeah?
[JOHN GRUNTS]
ARIEL: Well, it's my inspiration. - You did...? You're an artist?
Hey, Pop.
- Oh, yeah. - Uh-huh?
Oh shut up, fat-ass!
The Green Hornet's caught more fish than you've lied about, Gustafson.
And if anybody says otherwise they're damn liars.
We're having a heat wave here.
- He's in. - He's in.
Looks like Jerry’s Been enjoying a “different”
[SNYDER GRUNTING]
- Okay, here we go. - Oh, wow!
- Son of a... - Jealous?
[MUTTERING]
It's not even Thanksgiving, and here we are enjoying our lovely fall weather.
Very. She also looks to still be married.
He's dead.
When I had my ulcers, I was...
Hi, John.
Can I put Allie in your bed?
MAN: Marker.
...and all you can do is shout at me. - Wait.
- Some game last night. MAX: Double overtime.
So how you been?
...you'd be advised to stay inside and have yourself...
[OPERA MUSIC PLAYING]
Hey, Jacob, you got my vote. That's terrific.
Now stay tuned for tonight's $6.4 million jackpot on Powerball.
I'd rather kiss a dead moose's butt.
Ah, well, I had all of this stuff that I had to get taken care of. I, uh...