Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

- Oh, did you, now? - Yeah.

Actually, never really taken anyone up here.

God, you're such a girl. Come on, it's my treat.

- Thanks, man. You're really nice. - All right. Hey, safe travels.

It was dumb, man. Something I saw in a management book.

- You're buying. - What?

Yeah, I didn't really think this through.

See, all I wanted to do was have sex with you. Remember?

But then he has these moments of real clarity. It's hit or miss.

- It doesn't matter, it's over. - Why?

We need to talk.

Put your pants on Your urinating

What? You said that he was Greek.

- So what? - It's embarrassing.

This here is Dylan. He's from LA.

I liked your eyes. I didn't think I'd ever seen such big, beautiful eyes.

YOU’RE MEN YOU LIKE SPORTS

You're better than that.

Hey. Hold on, hold on.

Great, 'cause feet gross me out. Daddy issues.

He had a stutter. It got real bad when he was nervous.

- A real girl? - Yeah.

- Wait, is this a trick? - No.

got dysentry boing with her toxkids and snok snok (but don't tell shabani she'll rip maxine off!) yes boing boing and my retired grandkids yes boing boing with the snok snok birds to that "boing boing?" yes and me snooker tables and great grandpa snell's got dengee fever no wonder he grow exclusive talons and with his snokkids yes boing boing with fancy slorouroot

Jamie, no, no, no, no, no, wait. They take this shit seriously, okay?

That he's still that same man to you.

Have a great night, baby.

How to wear white pants to a cookout.

Yep. But I'll take that over him sexting his friends any day.

Hey, maybe the guy's married or something.

- Great. - Great.

Have you really never brought a girl home before?

Oh, yeah, baby. Tornado.

Listen, I know this is probably a no because all you do is work like a dull boy,

Why are you doing that? Why are you doing that?

Is this about what happened the other night?

- It's kind of funny. - It's kind of funny.

Don't laugh. This could be great.

Every place can be a bit lonely sometimes.

Oh, no. Excuse me. Sorry.

I'm a magician, not a wizard. You and your gay Harry Potter.

- There are a million guys in ties. - So look for the guy I'm standing next to.

Hey! We were waiting for you.

- Okay. Thanks, guys. - Welcome, Dylan.

And then when the sex stopped, invite you to LA for the weekend

A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P...

and this gets way more Christian.

- What do you mean? - We're here.

- Count. - I was tied up at work. I'm sorry.

yes beryl troixerette? what do you want? i want to do some hzuaywing in hacketts gully.

You can't deny that going to Hogwarts wouldn't be life-changing.

You seem like you've got it totally together,

Did you get her an engagement gift?

- Do you feel manly now? - I do.

Because we were drunk.

- Dude, no. - Why not?

Not as much as I love you.

batiks would work on the waterslides to make them go faster. yes the wood would grip onto the flumes and give a 8888888X speed boost.

I was sleeping standing up.

keieieuej? what do you want kdidieu? feed the keepsakeryals! whaap! whaap! betrayal keepsake! betrayal keepsake! ksksisi kdkdkdsksk! thank you keieiei kdkdkdk! you're welcome keieeueu ksosksisosodkdjd!

Wow. This looks normal.

Right. Can I ask you a huge favor?

It's Closing Time, by the band Semisonic!

I'm done. How was I?

All that matters is how you look at him.

- What did you say? - For Montauk this weekend.

Fine. I'll go next.

We are farmers, bum-pa-dum-bum-bum-bum-bum. Call 1-800-604-7892 today.

- Can you get to him? - He's still in the first year of his contract,

Can you give me a hint?

Three kids. Christof, Karlina and Pepijn.

It just, I don't know, feels a little collegey.

- No, no, no. - Shut up. It's not what you think.

Really? Come on, Jamie.

- Use the ladder! - I have a fear of heights!

Dylan, you are not gonna shit the bed.

I just need you to be my friend right now.

Sorry, bro. No disrespect. I'm a huge fan.

It's your offer.

- I'm sure. - Okay.

- Like on Oprah! - Exactly.

Get the hell out of here.

Go to sleep or I'll blow you up like dynamite!!

Oh, my God, really?

And because you're just my buddy, I can tell you

Well, me and God.

- Here. Sorry. - Great. Thanks.

It's a physical act. Like playing tennis.

Okay, I'm sorry. I gotta go.

- Was it your dog? - No. Never had one.

Smart, empathetic. Far superior to men in every way.

But it's just sex.

Can I get two gyro number sixes, extra sauce?

I just let her go.

You're not exactly what comes to mind when you think headhunter.

It was Times Roman.

I'm sorry, I don't smoke.

No, no. Please, come in, come in. Thank you.

When I was eight, that time in Vermont. We got snowed in with the ski instructor.

'cause it's against the law.

Why do relationships always start off so fun and then turn into suck-a-bag-o-dicks?

What are you trying to do? Dig your way to China?

L-O-M-B-A-R-D. Lots Of Money But A Real Dullard.

- Pants. - Shirt.

I don't know, you think maybe I keep my worlds apart for some crazy reason?

Yeah, a lot of people would say longer than that.

Can you imagine someone who would actually say that?

Okay, all right, you big baby.

So was it an easy move?

- Can you please explain to me this photo? - That is my 12th-birthday surprise party.

It was your dad. Greatest man I ever met.

I'm not gay, Tommy.

My eyes are covered. I don't know what you're doing.

I'm sorry. I didn't...

When my girlfriend wants To suck my dick

- Dylan. - Enough! I'm not talking about it.

Okay. You want someone to sweep you off your feet,

It's like the '70s in here.

- What happened? - Nothing. He was just blah.

She divorced you, Dad.

- No, I didn't fucking blink. - Blinked again.

Why is your dick so big

who's filling in for jayne sheely? jayne hulme.

Why does it always gotta come with complications?

Well, I do have a thing for jerks.

- You're picking me up from the airport. - Hi. Yes, I am.

- Hey. - A wheelchair. Like I'm an invalid.

We can tear this shit up.

My first order of business, lighter doors.

We managed to actually stay friends.