Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

If I were you, I'd leave as soon as possible.

I want you to hold me. Papi. I need you.

Penis... my only weakness. How did you know?

We gotta freakin' go to Europe and find Maria.

Hunger, Harold.

Harold, I need you to update those models for me.

What are some potential symptoms of pancreatitis?

Whatever happened to good old American names like Dave or Jim?

- Where? - Amsterdam, man.

I am not seeing Cindy Kim.

You sunk my battleshit

Asian tits! I wanna squeeze 'em!!

you have to go for it.

and I can hang-glide and I can ride a cheetah,

No no no I don't like breaking the law

- Dude, we're so high right now. - We're not low.

Oh, nice. Sixteen Candles is on, man.

Yeah, mist, hence the mist setting.

the Hemoglobin Trotters.

meetings my only weakness, how did you know

The Devil is Everywhere

You guys might have wanted to stay away

I know, but I got a lot of work to do.

I am serious. You wanna know what happened?

Eating those delicious burgers made me feel like a new man.

I'm telling you, hit up the Asian party.

You know what, dude?

Dude, I told you not to bring the beef jerky.

if there's one thing I've learned, it's that if you're craving White Castle,

It was last spotted in Randolph County. South of...

Living in Northern AZ..."Have you seen an Native guy?" Yeah...only when I open my eyes, though...

Are you saying what I think you're saying?

and there you are.

Boxes... my only weakness. How did you know?

Fucking assholes.

- Hey, check this out! - Yeah, nice!

Did she touch your penis?

Excuse me, officer, let me take a couple of guesses.

Dude, fuckin' I will see your 20 burgers and raise you 5 orders of fries.

No, we're watching The Gift on HBO.

Katie Holmes is a nice, respectable, wholesome girl... And I’m going to see her boobs!!

Yo, I'm in here, dude.

The things I would eat out of her ass… You have no idea!

Just makes me want to Burn this ************ Down

Hey, Clarissa, do you want to play battle shits?

how to get to the White Castle in Cherry Hill from here?

No shit. You know, you might be worthwhile after all.

With all the downsizing that's been going on around here,

Sorry. It won't happen again, okay?

who are suspected of terrorizing numerous strip malls

We're gonna die.

I want something we haven't had in a while.

and then go eat just like we planned. Now, just calm down.

You gonna talk to her this time,

It's not funny.

Hemo-globin Trotters... get it?

So you don't even have a plan.

We'll just take what he wrote down about you and leave.

- What the hell are you doing? - I'm not going back to jail, man.

Do you realize what the hell we had to go through after you took the car?

Here. This is Harold's understudy. You can do whatever you want.

he and I had some pretty wild times back in med school.

Yeah, they were nice.

The patient was brought in by EMS five minutes ago.

Where the hell is my spare tire?

I leave the decision up to you.

Kenny's mom dropped off a big pot of kimchi jigae.

for racial discrimination and police brutality.

It's gonna be a few minutes.

Hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry.

Absolutely right.

- What, are you kidding? - No way! Forget it.

to put these skateboard punks in jail for the next couple of years.

I have a meeting with the Amazon suits and I’ll never get the packages delivered on time.

Round one of today's Battle Shits Goes to Chris "Liquid Magma" Maker!

I'm sorry. I can't go. I have to wait for Kumar.

- You sure? - You said it.

So where exactly are we going?

his is actually a two-part question.

They're totally gay for each other.

I think I have to go to the hospital.

Hey, Roldy, check it out.

Fuck you, raccoon!

from the Morristown Zoo.

Excuse me, can you tell us how to get to the highway from here?

- Could I get a little dab here? - Hush now, hush now.

Now I gotta go back to the office and redo it.

He couldn't have said that.

You'll see him when we're done.

Living in Northern AZ..."Have you seen an Indian guy?" Yeah...only when I open my eyes, though...

- Chill. We'll find it. - Wait a second... is that the multiplex?

Kumar, shut up.

If he wants to cut me off, fine. I don't need his money.

Leland, you don’t ever pee your pants at your teacher’s lap, because she is in her job to do some math together.

Gendered third-person pronouns... my only weakness how did you know?

- Thank you. - Thanks a lot.

white names Slices only weakness

After Easter service one day, I told him how much I loved his solo

- Fuck you. - Fuck you.

You’re Glistening

What about Freakshow?

Hey, Kumar. Kumar! Where are you...

It's really good. It's delicious.

you the king of the forest?

Plus I have a really large penis That keeps me happy

Yeah, koo-marrrr

And if Liane can marry a guy like Freakshow

Barracuda to Sparrow, Barracuda to Sparrow.

- What are you doing? - Excuse me, Maria!