Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Now you have been crowned the Christmas... Praise. Hallelujah.

I will not step foot back in that house!

Morning y’all

Child, these nipples so tough, you need a mammogram.

and I'm going to have a baby-ist.

- You teach me. - You're supposed to direct the customers...

No. Were you able to talk to your parents?

I have a meeting down the hall...

What y'all gonna do about it? What y'all gonna do about it?

The town's going on with it, but we're not happy...

- How are ya? - Thems pigs was starving to death.

No, you're actin' more like the devil than she is.

- Yeah, how do we? - It happens all the time,

I've done everything she wanted. Always.

- Eileen! - Come, come, come.

And he was in love with her. She said, Joe.

I'm not trying to attack you or her.

- Y'all need to say something. - It's not me. I wanna tell her.

I couldn't afford it. She just wanted them Starz.

Sit there as long as you want. I don't give a damn.

This is it. You didn't get the gift you wanted. Bring your ass in the house.

What y'all talking about over there?

Last time I was in Alabama, I was chained to Andy Young and Jesse Jackson.

That's comforting.

You cut down my family's memory tree.

Trees are for the family, not for strangers.

Hey there. I was getting ready to go...

When you smoke 'em, they make you feel like it's Christmas.

Good to see you. Good to see you. All right, all right.

- I don't understand. - I think I do. Let me ask you something.

But Conner, he's got him a new strain of corn that takes less water.

You sure you didn't tell her we were coming?

There will be no bullying in this class.

Hey, Son, see this? This ain't fat. This is all foreskin.

But she didn't want to, so what can you do?

- But you giving milk. - Well, hello.

with all that's been going on with the dam.

He really should go to a gifted school with a fine arts department.

They wanted to make fun of me. But I wasn't having it.

Why'd you do that to Mrs. Williams?

All I'm saying is this...

- Right. Come on in. - Thank you.

If this Christmas Jubilee don't happen...

Well, that woman's a pretty pissed off ox.

- Yeah. - All right?

Give this child the gift of being able to do whatever she want to do.

- I am not trying to... - Let me get the lines clean.

They tell me you're planning on planting corn this year.

Lacey, I am so disappointed in you.

I don't like it. It's wrong.

I have a meeting down the hall...

All right. Keep going.

And your parents are on their way.

It had to be done.

It's such a shame she does not know what kind of person you are.

- You belong in this class? - Yes, ma'am.

Well, Miss Media, we're gonna bring her...

What's in it for you?

managed to put most of our crops out of business.

- Can you give us a comment? - So without further ado...

We just need a defibrillator. She gonna have a heart attack.

Come on. Sit down. Take a load off.

All right. Get up. Get up.

Where my purse? Unlock the damn thing!

FEELIN A LITTLE LIGHT-HEADED

We could care less you're black.

so you all will know what my name is.

Your mama used to have a nice rack.

- I'm glad you recognize that. - Honey, we love you.

I don't like this. Go knock on the door.

- What the hell you think you're doin'? - What are you talking about?

and now I am getting very upset!

What is Oliver supposed to think, you living with a man?

- Y'all get your ass shot. - I like her. I do.

I'm sorry. I can't do that.

She says she wants to start a farm.

- Sheldon Construction. - What?

- Do you understand? - Yes, ma'am.

I look like the whole damn red-light district.

and I don't know what the hell gonna...

- Start slow, all right? - I was just kidding.

You don't want to come in 'cause you mad about something?

But she had cancer. My uncle Bayrod.

that I didn't tell you, but this is my life.

- Please, drink up. - I'll tell you what, Son.

Lacey's not coming for Christmas.

Damien and Michele gettin' on my damn nerves.

We don't need her help. She ain't from around here.

Put it in there, come out sounding like brakes coming out of...

You think the Jubilee is gonna happen this year?

Hello? Hey, I need y'all to go get me some scratch-offs.

Now, you know what to do and you know how to behave, right?

I'm gonna sleep with one eye open tonight.

Now I'm plantin' corn...

I know damn well you hear me calling you. Eileen!

- I didn't take my medicine this morning. - What medicine?

RON HANST WHAT TIME YOU WANNA LEAVE?

I was so upset when I heard you two eloped.

Glad I can help.

I've seen her shoot a deer once though.

Actually, I do. I'm on my way. I'll talk to you later.

- Back porch and everything. - Aunt Madea, you like it?

I do too. She likes to hang.

She been manipulating you. She as healthy as an ox.

about not being able to say Jesus or celebrate his birth.

and this has all been under the direction of their current teacher...

You always remember that.

Eileen, here. This a... Child, please.

I need to introduce myself, but where are my manners?

is pretty crazy.

Good morning everyone Have a great day ahead

That last girl you with was so dadgum ugly...

- She didn't have no heart attack. - She had heartburn?

I slopped them, and I've been trying to get milk for Eileen.

Put the pedal to the metal. Get the hell outta here!

A little dusty, dusty.

I see the way you look at her, the way she look at you.

Oh, jingle bells, jingle bells

How you doin'? We are lost. He trying to find direction.

Honey, we taught all of our children...

- You should. He still wants you. - Mama, please.

Hello. Hello. Now, y'all got to go back to the Stepford children.

I will not step into that house of lies.

Last time you went to the doctor, you had a rash.

like a wet cat on a cold Sunday morning who needs some milk.

I'm going in. You wanna sit out here and freeze, sit your ass out here...

There ain't no cabs out here. You wanna come back in the house?

I like tofu farters. God bless you.

- Let 'em leave. - No, I'm on the side of right.

So many memories just coming back to me bein' here.

Gotta get these poinsetters sold.

would look good right here.

Child, me and children don't get along.

Did you hear the one about the two rabbi's and the black dude?

I had such a crazy, crazy-ass dream last night.