Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

- What? - I'm sorry!

What did he say, Dad?

- Sweetheart... - See what you've done?

vision and awareness - absolutely magnificent.

Going on about him and his private business in the papers like that.

Wow! And that's why you need an lndian boyfriend?

you know, in swimwear and sarongs and that...

Oh, man! Unlucky, Tony, mate!

- Ηow long have you been playing? - For ages, but just in the park.

I want Jesminder to go to college first, anywhere that she wants.

Look, we're not trying to cause trouble.

- That's the best bit! - Yeah, you should know!

When I jumped up to the grill to get the toast, my trousers caught alight,

Oh, here he is.

And the Old Trafford crowd warming now to the way Beckham is taking over.

- Let me see 'em! - Ηey, come here.

Oh, Mum, don't do pickle as well!

Lesbian? Ηer birthday's in March. I thought she was a Pisces.

I turned them down.

- What does she look like? - She looks like a jar of bloody Ragú, innit?

Εnough about football. Come on, you're dancing with me.

Yeah, well, you fancying your gora coach is OΚ with me.

We can do what we want.

at Old Trafford!

I'm so excited!

Dad hasn't talked to me since.

Εxcuse me, it's getting really late. You'd better board the plane.

- Where do you normally play? - In the park.

Ηow could you be such a hypocrite?!

Losing to the Jerries on penalties comes natural to you English

I think she got confused like Teetu's parents.

You're lucky...to have a family that cares that much about you.

I don't need to feel close to my family, Jess.

At least I can still skin you alive!

Jules still has a shot.

Don't be silly. I'm not promised to anyone.

- Doesn't she look good? - She looks great.

not bring back food for you.

- No! - You are!

Εveryone I know's a prat. They think girls can't play as well as them,

- I mean, look at Posh and Becks. - Well, Beckham's the best.

but can't make round chapatis?

Will it be Scholes? Could it possibly be Ryan Giggs?

lt's a goal by Jess Bhamra!

You look lovely.

Are you ready to go? See you slags later!

- Get your boots on. - I haven't got any.

Yeah, that's it. Bye!

Oh, it's so amazing! Me and Jess there together, the pair of us!

- Ηi. - Ηello. Nice to meet you.

- Yeah, yeah. Make it 34 and a half. - No, tighter!

I'm not blaming you, but it is the football.

Stupid cow. I had matching accessories and everything!

Feeling hot, hot, hot!

Come on! Are you gonna dance with me?

OK, OK, fine, baba, let's just do it before something else goes wrong!

Look how happy they are, Tony. I don't want to ruin it for 'em.

- Ηe's interested in both of you. - Me?

Probably won't get it. Better not to count on anything.

Of course I'd understand what that feels like.

On the contrary, I vowed that I will never play again.

They saw you at a bus stop kissing him!

Jessie's a good girl now.

You think they will let our girls?

I usually play all over, but up front - on the right is best.

poured cold water over me and pulled them off,

And you cannot slip

It's a proper pitch with lights, corner flags, changing rooms...

But it wasn't my fault!

- Wonderful! - Ηave you read all these as well?

and Silvestre here at left back,

And took me in so soon

You lift my spirit, you melt the ice

the sea salt has to be level with the mustard.

or a proper Sikh with a full beard and a turban?

Jess, you're not going to tell anyone?

We need some pace up front. Jules could do with some decent service.

She's a footballer. She's on the team with me.

Cast off after three years of being married to a white boy with blue hair!

Well done, Jenny!

Yeah, yeah, yeah

Jesminder, oh yeah, I'm sorry. I cooked a lovely curry the other day.

lt's that coach bloke, innit? I knew something was up when he turned up here!

Honey, all I'm saying is, there is a reason Sporty Spice is the only one without a fella.

Oh, God, why did you give me two deceiving daughters?

That even with the distance and the concerns of your family,