Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

And she could give two Fs

You might wanna wear sneakers or a square toe--

I know you're not gonna believe this,

* 'Cause that's one more than 2gether *

- Did Jeter buy you those? - No!

- Scott, I'm not leaving you.

- * Seize the tonight *

You don't get to decide

- I didn't know that. Fun facts.

before the rant starts.

We'll make it work, because it's important

* And wear our comfortable shoes *

- [inhales deeply]

a performance, there's a meet and greet

- Nothing. - Come on.

"I'm here to pick up my son to take him to a free zoo."

And I have punched out so many car windows

Figures such as Bette Davis and Judy Garland

I can't open cans with my nails--pfft.

and that's why I love you.

that we do the show for Gloria.

- That's right. I'm a flap jacket gay diva.

- My lip-sync blew up gay Twitter.

I can see the outline

- Driving a Miata somewhere. - Oh, God.

- I'll do cauliflower steak... - But just maybe not

Well, all I know is I can't wait

Is that anything? Put that down to be safe.

- I finally get empathy.

Worry isn't really my thing. Do you know what I mean, Brian?

Nicki Minaj has Roman Zolanski,

- Oh, a temporary tramp stamp.

and I can't wait to inspire the crap out of some queer women.

- I was shook. This is real pee.

I was like, "Zander be a business boy,"

Wonderful! Next!

in a community theater subreddit and struck gold.

Well, you know what?

- Okay, today-- [clears throat]

- You need to cease and desist

- I'll try. Is this a better face?

Cease and desist, bitches! [cheers and applause]

and I never told you my name. - [laughs]