Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Will everyone who has ever died be there?

That's so weird I never knew your real name. Doug is good. It suits you.

There's no such thing as deceit or flattery or fiction.

Well, I'm relieved you're not a couple of black guys.

(Mouthing) Man-bitch.

-I knew it. -But...

But I've been blessed with some luck as well in my life.

What's the next thing you'd do?

-Good luck. -Thank you.

Let's hang out. I'll see you tonight.

And I unearthed it, and it was an ancient chest.

I want you to start immediately 'cause I think this could be

-Rule. -Such a shame to waste it.

I know you didn't have to do... You're very pretty! Good night!

Can I... Do you mind if I...

Don't you wish you could change things?

It does not look very good. She suffered a major heart attack.

I say fuck the man that lives in the sky!

(Crowd Clamouring)

I said, Fat faggot.

-Please take this. -Have a nice life.

-There You Go. -Thank You.

Awful crimes, rape, murder, things like that.

-I know. -Some of the games are fixed,

What do you mean, she's gonna die tonight?

It tastes so good, Mommy.

I don't do well with other people's life-changing stories.

Shelley: No, thank you!

-No, no, I can make it work. -Mark.

Unfortunately, sir, the system is down right now,

It's all right, though. Seems nice. Kind of funny.

Yeah. Of course. Everyone gets a mansion.

Probably what attracted the bear in the first place.

If I do just one bad thing, do I go to the bad place?

-Hey, Mark. How's it going? -Hi, Frank. Not too well.

I only have a certain amount of time that I can find my ideal genetic partner,

Congratulations! I gotta go.

And it was as easy as... How do I explain this?

-You're going to jail. Step out of the vehicle. -I don't want to.

35 black. No one wins.

JIM: Stay tuned, we got weather in five.

and the nude Amazonian alien women, all in one sweeping motion.

Yeah, classic. So, I land.

-I know. -And even if you happen to win,

it tastes good, and I'm important.

Oh! Hi, Mark. Didn't you get my e-mail?

you can't afford my bribe.

Don't put that on the ice cream, then! What is the matter with you people?

This is a typical town in that world.

Let's have a drink. You look like you'd like a...

but you said you wanted to withdraw 800?

Yeah. That's about it.

Well, that was one of the worst experiences of my life.

And you are fun to be with.

-You should be ashamed of yourself! -Officer.

I apologise, sir.

Mark: You can't tell that from just looking at the guy.

That's why I'll always be alone.

Then why are you marrying him?

while I did enjoy your company,

Who says that a strong jawline or a fast metabolism or a muscular physique...

But I don't hold out much hope for the future.

A little frustrated at the moment.

I'm not happy because

It's not an eternity of nothingness.

Think that went well.

Burglary. Houses, mainly.

Good. Number two,

Oh, agreed. That, too.

-Good. That's settled, then. -All right. Have a nice day.

and not really looking forward to tonight in general,

so there's nothing new I can tell you about that.

-S peak to him. Don't blow this. -(WHISPERING) Mom!

with his friend who was a polar bear who lived there.

Things aren't much better for me here. But could be worse.

You're gonna be happy.

and to protect your offspring for as long as you can?

Yeah. And everyone you've ever loved and who's ever loved you will be there.

Tell me something about you, though.

-I always wanted a black friend. -Me, too.

Hello, Brad. One moment.

You're chubby and you have a snub nose.

Is there anything else I can do for you today, sir?

It's the adrenaline.

We could be homeless.

(STATIC CRACKLING)

-No, I'll wait. -Yeah?

I never really knew him.

This is incredible.

He's saying, Why are you speaking to that idiot?

It's a never-before-heard event from history.

-Hi. -I'm here for the rent.

Why don't you just ask the man in the sky what he wants for Anna?

scares both my mother and me equally.

You know, you are a near perfect match for me,

screenplay by Brad Kessler and starring Nathan Goldfrappe,

Can we... Please. Number six,

Not now. Let's...