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Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips
it is a bargain at two million pounds.
Interested now?
of the fairer sex do find it quite appealing.
Alastair.
(SIREN WAILS)
Mortdecai.
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)
to my client, Milton Krampf,
Oh! Hello!
Yangtze ceramics are low-fired.
- Martland... - God.
threatening the lives of your countrymen.
(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY) Ooh.
(STAMMERING) By myself?
Just a little something I cooked up
Well, come on, then.
Cowgirl
MAN: Where is he?
And I shan't be having dinner downstairs this evening.
(LAUGHING)
(GUNSHOT)
Which Duke?
- Yes! - Well then, what's the point?
Come on, you little bastards. Come out and get it.
My... My love. My...
Yes, sir.
Metaphoric woman... Women.
Oh, I see.
It's not some Toyota Clitoris.
I deeply, deeply love
Ah! Hello, Spinoza, you handsome devil!
Please, will you make up
MORTDECAI: A fake? How do you know?
It's so wonderful to have someone
(CLICKING)
Recently, after we'd concluded the sale of a painting
Sorry. You were saying?
Right. Yes, well...
An exquisite invitation, Your Grace,
MARTLAND: There's their car!
(ENGINE STARTS)
Shall we to business then, Fang?
Recently, he's been working his way up to the wickedest.
(GROWLING)
sent her a Goya to be cleaned.
Goody. Every subject of the Crown and
- Jock? - Yeah?
MARTLAND: Oh, is he still alive?
Oh, you know who I mean.
(MORTDECAI YELPING)
Autumn Master's Sale. We shall begin with Lot One.
Bunny is a soldier in your unit?
(MORTDECAI STAMMERING)
Out of the way, out of the way.
(YELPS)
there is more here than meets the eye.
Bit redundant, really, as he's dead.
Uh, no. We have two items of business.
Alastair.
Oh.
Well then, Mr. Krampf. I suppose since you're here
No, I do not know that, Maurice.
MARTLAND: I followed you.
as it were?
I understand you were close with Bronwen Fellworthy.
(WHIMPERING)
I sunk into an uneasy slumber,
Once in a while I provide him
No!
Oh...
Already have, madam.
(BOTH GAGGING)
I wouldn't, mate. I really wouldn't.
Bit of a moron, actually.
of the building, break through the window, grab the painting.
Hmm?
some discussion about your finger.
Oh, God!
(YELLING)
(JOCK AND WOMAN MOANING ON PHONE)
Thank heaven.
(DOOR BUZZING)
I'll call Spinoza in the morning.
Ahh!
Does it matter?
Find out if he's got that painting.
I never met your mother.
I say, old bean!
There's more, there's more, there's more...
(YELLING)
(EXHALING SHARPLY)
Oh, excellent.
MORTDECAI: Rotten timing for him.
Some say that Goya himself engineered the theft.
The only advice I offer is you do not apply
What?
then found out it is worth only one!
Do Not Disturb sign, and a bulldozer.
Ooh...
Jockie, thank heavens! Where have you been, man?
But
So you admit there were indiscretions?
You cheated me in our last deal.
...what else can you tell me about Strago?
(INHALES SHARPLY)
We are going to enter the Goya into the auction,
You one book short of a library, you maggot? Eh?
Thank you!
The auction got it.
Oh! Ooh!
You have a Turner of the Loire,
and became the stuff of legend.
a proper send-off.
And 10 percent of the insurance money
The Duke is Bunny.
- Like this? - Sorry, I meant to the right.
He is the filthy underside.
Right.
- Wouldn't that be funny? - Hilarious.
to look at his John Thomas.
I was admiring your Franz Joseph.
My love, you are killing me. Please.
Come, come. Let's not be rash.
Goya was commissioned by Charles IV of Spain
Oh, don't worry about her.
You mother-loving bastard! Hello.
Oh...
to disastrous effect upon the world.
Bronwen lied from the start.
- Go bid! - Oh!
Well, good luck, mate.
I needed something bold, distinctive.
"(WAILING)"
MORTDECAI: Besides being the finest garage man
holding a dead man's Goya.
Oh yeah hey you Going to Chuck E. Cheese’s
JOCK: Hang on, sir!