Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Oh, you don't remember Llama v. Ferguson?

ALL: You choose it, you dooze it!

So, by now you've all seen the NSA satellite footage

If he's here, I'm gonna kill him before he kills me.

You look like an orchestra conductor for stray cats.

Maybe just kind of a... Just a general sense of...

- Mazel tov! - Congratulations!

Hey, is that...

Great White Buffalo.

Yeah, I think I can probably make it.

Technically, you all aren't married yet,

but I'm gonna assume you're putting king and throne in quotes.

to keep his shitty career going.

- Is Bruce in that? - JACOB: Okay.

Okay, just laying it all out there.

They're like, picking dicks out of a tree

Nothing but net. Nothing but net.

for it to fully flush out of your system, so there's no trace.

There's definitely fucking semen in that.

A banana thrown in there.

I'm a fucking god!

- Any luck? - (LAUGHS)

I hear you there, brother.

Einstein's a stupid fucking idiot.

And your son will do it after you.

Is that the coat-check girl?

I was on track to be 20 Under 40,

we wake up back in time.

I'll turn you around.

(HEAVY METAL MUSIC PLAYING)

- My dick! My dick! - (BOTH YELLING)

How can I take what doesn't exist yet?

Lou got it from the Russians.

If you truly believe that in your heart of hearts,

I want to hit you into the corner pocket.

Hey, how are you?

Daddy's little buddy is turning into Daddy's big buddy.

- Oops. - Then what happened?

It's a step-by-step guide for how to be a shitty parent.

Media preferences, Mr. Dorchen?

Too bad the tub is gone.

Would you please do the Webber Strut?

(THUNDER RUMBLING)

I just bought more Airrack yeah!!! I will finally rich

And hello, sir. Who are you?

Jacob, how can we expect to find happiness

I'd be rich. Look.

The drugs, the constant partying.

You got your hand on my penis!

We're too late. We just missed him.

- Yes! - BOTH: The moon!

This one's mine.

that's ever happened to us. That car's an asshole.

- You flickered. - Ah, you're flickering.

But I don't care.

Where the hell is he?

I apologize. You were totally wrong.

LOU: Guys, guys, guys, come on!

I'm sorry. Okay.

Hey. That doesn't matter.

Uh, so you guys are my dad's full-on bros, huh?

But who's to say the past isn't anything more

Adam! Come on out!

Just gonna go back in time and kill my dad.

Here what comes?

And if you see your second chance

I'm going to Winkle's.

Do I need any nipple rouge?

This is my house.

So Lou is killed in our present,

- That's awesome. - NICK: Right.

(SCOFFS) Shut up.

Yeah, I'm sure.

You think I don't want to roll my dick around some cocaine,

JACOB: What are you doing up there?

- (GUNSHOT) - (ALL EXCLAIM)

to build the most innovative, forward-thinking

I mean, I wouldn't mind a little something.

NICK: He looks like a preppie Braveheart.

and we're just a bunch of fuck-ups.

(DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)

No, Lou, just 'cause my room's near the bar

- (GRUNTS) - WOMAN: Hey!

ADAM: Hey, lick my pussy.

so if you have a reunion speech,

So I think what that means is the killer is from the future.

I swear to God. Look, look, look!

- LOU: Oh, wow! Okay. - Fuck your ball juice!

Oh, I had to throw him out, like I always do.

You should be dead.

I don't give a shit. We did it on the stairs.

(CELL PHONE RINGING)

All that and one less minute tonight on 59 Minutes.

Yeah, we should get that show cancelled.

It doesn't say anything!

- Hey, Brad. - Hey, Jacob...

Worth 2.3 billion dollars, introducing

Oh, shit! Shit! Susan, look, turn around.

Then she probably saw it.

So far so good on this future shit, huh?

I don't take their stuff.

Okay, first of all, this isn't a tuxedo,

Hey, check it out. I found all the gear from the painting.

Every fucking year, Lou?

Yeah. You guys gotta come with me.

- I'm so sorry. - I'm sorry.

It's not about money, it's about making money.

That's what uncles do, right?

What kind of brush is that? Is that rabbit fur?

Okay. Here's the thing, Soph,

If we ever come up with a division where

KELLY: All right, let's see what we have here.

Ready for another dip?

Okay. (GIGGLES)

would do it any differently. Am I right?

that I'd helped him place there.

- 911, right? - Yeah.

And they came here in a, uh... What was it?

I don't care, 'cause there's cocaine right there.

- Which happens in the past. - Exactly.

Right on, Liz. Give the pretty lady a flower.

somebody finds it, reverse engineers that shit. Boom!

Okay, Choozy Doozy is my favorite show.

before their wedding, right?

You work his dick. Whatever.

So why doesn't Uncle Lou give you guys a little taste, huh?

Hey, what do you guys want from the party tray?

We did it, guys! We got to the crossroads!

Football, basketball, you know, just all the sports.

I'm going to help you out. It's not really my birthday.

I've been on a roll.

Lie is actually... It's not right, either.

Be nice. Be nice. Be nice. Be nice. Be nice. Be nice.

Well, maybe it's not a big deal to you,

It's enough to make anybody ask, When is enough enough?

This is going to get complicated.

- Okay? - This is a family show?

What? Yes! See?

Now what's gonna happen, I'm going to pull this out,

Thank you. Well, it's for our...

I mean, look how classy it is. It's like a museum.

It felt like kind of a gray area.

Uh, MMM Bop, triple platinum.

What did I keep saying? Protect the ears.

Oh, fuck this guy and his riddles!

You look like you advise Lando Calrissian.

What exactly is this?