Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

-Nope, thanks for pIaying, move aIong. -It's that simpIe.
...that I didn't know what it feIt Iike...
More women are accepted into Iaw schooI now than men.
WeII, Iisten...
Not hot yoga-instructing singers...
...through all of the pain and embarrassment...
GEORGE: Argh! DEVON: That is so embarrassing.
ObviousIy.
You're busy. I shouIdn't have caIIed. You caIIed me.
-I'm reaIIy sorry to bug you. -That's okay.
...he's gonna think I'm some kind of psycho or something.
You had some reaIIy good insights and I wanted to ask you a question.
Which, of course, I shouId be pissed about, right?
[CHUCKLES]
[BEN LAUGHS]
Okay. AII right.
Why wouId you do this?
What she meant to say was that it's fine that you broke up with NeiI.
I mean...
WeII, I'd say if we're not at reIationship station-ship...
You know, when AIex said he wanted to throw a party, I was Iike, ''Let's do it!''
No, I reaIIy think that it wouId be good for me to know...
Is that your--?
I just was actuaIIy in the area...
...but she got a Iot of good miIes Ieft in that tank.
Shit!
I like him, I'll say that L word.
Okay, so cIearIy he hasn't caIIed.
You're what I want.
-He was cute. -Yeah, pIease don't cyber-staIk him.
Or he didn't caII because he has no interest in seeing you again.
BEN: It's over there.
Anna gave me the oId, ''I'II caII you right back.''
-Yeah? -Yeah.
What?
-Can you hoId this for a second? -Yeah.
My trampy IittIe sister says MySpace is the new booty caII.
No, I didn't mean for you, I meant f--
[PLATES SHATTERING]
...but at Ieast that means I stiII care.
You need me to evaIuate any IeveI of interest?
Yeah. You're sitting back and you're like:
This constant obsession with needing to know who's caIIing aII the time...
I'm pretty sure.
Morning.
Sure. It's basicaIIy done. I have to teII you something important.
Someone just dropped Iike 84,000 pIates. Maybe I'II see you there.
This babe has plenty of battle scars.
So you never wait untiI the Iast minute on a deadIine or a phone biII...
AII I know about Conor is that he soId us this house.
-Can't come home? Why? -No.
-I mean, there have been signs. -CooI.
[KIDS SHOUTING]
Why do women do this? BuiId up this stuff in their minds...
ActuaIIy been Iobbying to sit next to her singIe sister for weeks.
...that means he likes you.
No, of course, I'm not mad. Well, I'll be up for a while.
So are you here as, Iike, a guest, or, Iike, his date?
Coming, I'm coming, I'm coming.
Okay.
Oh, hi.
What part of ''My dad died of Iung cancer'' ...
DOMINIC: So where's NeiI?
Nothing. Sorry. For dinner?
I mean, reaIisticaIIy, what do I expect him to do, you know?
So we meet at happy hour and he's compIeteIy charming--
This is the most exciting thing that ever happened to me. Is that sad?
...for seven years and aren't married...
You may not get hurt or make an ass of yourseIf that way...
Daddy, what is it? What happened? What happened?
It's Brother Phoenix East-Horse.
That he had finaIIy met the one.
KELLI ANN: Hi. Are you joining us for dinner, or...?
...but he took the caII and we taIked for a whiIe.
...you borrowed my New York Times...
Yeah, Iook, we'II taIk. We'II get in touch.
Jumping every time your phone rings, checking your e-maiI 1 00 times a day...
you don’t put tomato sauce on rice yuck! I said to you raelene don’t put tomato sauce on the rice. well it’s like blood gangrene what the red dosen’t get in? and it’s your blood gouge.
So I've come up with some signs about how to spot this girI.
YOU ARE AMAZING !!!
But I just can't stop thinking about him.
[LAUGHS]
InhaIe, reverse warrior, Iook up.
So just caII me sometime.
Amanda.
-Mom, is that you? -Yes.
That's enough, okay? SeriousIy, you guys, I'm f--
Had to return this pen. He Ieft this.
You have to snake the drain when my hair gets cIogged.
...I think you can puII it off.
Oh, you are-- You're sensationaI.
PeopIe don't meet each other organicaIIy anymore.
-What? -Okay.
Oh, that's funny.
-Sorry. -I actuaIIy might be abIe to heIp.
''WiIson Ward, DDS, AduIt, ChiId and Geriatric Dentistry.''
-No. BRUCE: What?
Yeah. I Iive on my boat, man.
Okay, pIease.
Over a week went by, okay, Gigi? And he didn't caII you.
It was definiteIy fun.
If a guy gives you his phone number instead of taking yours, he's not interested.
...even though the date was just kind of mediocre?
To my face, under my roof, on my time.
...and was just wondering how you're doing.
Better later than never.
Hi.
-Sorry. -It's aII right.
You're more of a husband to me, not being married...
DEVON: Stay home. It's an end-around. GEORGE: No, no, it's not. He's stiII got it.
-Guys, come here! LAURA: What happened?
I wouId Iove to caII you sometime. Do you have a card?
Listen, I was wondering if you wanted to grab a Iate bite.
-WeII, that couId have been you. -Yeah.
...you have to Iet me eat those Wheat Thins in bed. You gotta give me that.
There are many peopIe who never get married.
I don't know. I'm gonna go.
Why? You don't want it here?
Her wedding. Her sister's wedding.
To work.
NEIL: Yeah.
Can I heIp you find something?
This is aII your fauIt.
Why'd she wanna hang out with you and your husband?
...but you don't ever feeI Iike we're going against nature, or something...
So....
Or, ''You're perfect, it's just I have to work on myseIf.''
You wouIdn't have to broadcast it.
ALEX: I really genuinely love this person--
I was just calling to tell you again how special it was to meet you.
Five years, because I haven't wanted to seem demanding.
MAN: Yeah, he quit.
LYING. SACK. OF SHIT.
Bethie.
...about how things might work out with these dipshits...
I'm not pregnant. That's ridicuIous.
-Good, I'm glad. [MOUTHING] I love her. I love her.
...I had him foIIowed on numerous occasions...
If being in this wedding is too painfuI--
Maybe I shouId get back to work.
i haven't seen you in years either granny raelene snell you old granny! you were -15 years old when you had your first tooth pulled! oh how you've been missed dear when i was still 0 in diapers! my how i've grown to 47 now with a bit of 0 left!
Laugh out Ioud! We won!
BuIIshit.
Wow, this is you. Mary.
You are so weird.
I'd rather be Iike that than be Iike you.
-These are specific reIationship situations. -I was taIking about myseIf specificaIIy.
[LAUGHS]
Whoa, Jenny, Jenny, Jenny
I'm dating now.
AII the women they're gonna miss out on.
I don't know if you'd caII it ''hot.''
Which I'm not.