Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Males compete for the female by bringing her presents.
That seems awful big to be a spider leg.
Winchester, 30.06...
What the fuck is that? What the fuck is that?
That was a long time ago. I'm a changed man now.
Bret?
They're here!
What exactly is that?
Ashley?
I don't know what's going on, but the phones are down.
- Can you give me a ride into town? - Sure. Hop in.
You have a right to an attorney. If you can't afford an attorney...
Can you turn that thing down? You're already deaf from it.
That's what I've been telling you!
- I was wondering if your mom was home? - Mom! It's for you.
- How's it looking? - Roof's clear.
Great, thanks.
You got it, Sam.
Sam!
- I need the phone. - You don't. You have no friends.
Can't get any worse.
The town is being overrun by giant spiders.
We gotta get out of here.
Who are the flowers for?
See?
Switch. Put this on.
- This is not Dial- A- Joke. - This is not a crank.
Never made Mother Teresa rich. L. Ron Hubbard?
Larry, do we know anybody at City Hall who might be able to take care of this?
That's disgusting.
The anal probe.
The Prosperity Mall!
...and the Lee Harvey Oswald rifle.
Those were big- Ass spiders! Really big ones!
But you won't believe me. I'm the kid. They never believe the kid.
- Could it be the "front gate" one? - Yeah, front gate.
No, no. No smoking.
You're a big fella.
Honey, give it a rest. It's so late. It's almost midnight.
No, Sam. Let me.
- Lt looks like an orb weaver den. - Get us out of here.
You just bring out the beast in me.
Welcome home.
Mom, they have to be quiet.
Oh, my God.
I want all men to wear masks at all times.
You know what? Let's just go back inside.
Don't...