Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Yeah.
You gonna push me over with your walker?
My name's not Doug, it's Schmidt.
Bracken is the loser!
Got it.
I want to see you get crazy!
See, you're fucking this up. You talk way too much.
Like, well, we fucking can, bro. All you gotta do is join the team.
I can't jump down! I'm not, like, fucking Spider-Man!
I'm having sex with a human woman.
I don't know if that's what I want.
No, we're not. If it was a white person, I wouldn't even care.
What if we actually went into the Secret Service
Yes, thank you.
How you bitches like Jump Street now?
For starters, Zook has it.
Get your wrinkly hands off me!
Hello, football.
But this pork shit? Got to go!
What's wrong with those classic drugs from the '90s?
- Bull's-eye. - Bingo.
I just don't want to start off on the wrong foot with this guy.
What the fuck y'all doing? Y'all rationing around here?
"Fieto," not a word, but I'm gonna accept it.
Fuck, fuck, fuck!
17769
- Brad. Wait... - Brad.
- We did it! - Dude, fuck, I'm...
You're not gonna die. Just get the fuck up here!
Snap, we're still saying the same thing. This is amazing!
Why is it hard?
- You want to go first? - I don't want to die.
Why don't you hold hands?
- Schmidt! - What the fuck, man?
- Are we gonna fuck? - No, we're not!
Nice, right?
But you can't allow yourself to be held down by a guy just because he won't let go.
It's a fascinating principle...
Let's go.
- Thank you. - No problem.
It was supposed to be our year
I'm just saying, it's, like, all fun and games,
I picked up on that early. Please, continue the dialogue.
They're destroying everything!
I'm just saying, the kid sucks.
Cover me. I'm gonna go long.
"You're dead You are dead
Your vagina doesn't fucking work, man.
It's gonna be fucking worth it, I promise, all right?
Dad, this is Doug, a guy that I'm dating.
You're hilarious, dude. What's your name?
Girl fight.
That's a pretty random question.
What can a black man do to get some water around here?
Yep.
'Cause we have guns.
Are we gonna fuck?
We Jump Street, and we about to jump in yo' ass.
He is angry Hahahahahahahahah
Shit!
No, I don't want out, okay?
It's like a Batmobile.
It's pretty gross.
Are we gonna fuck?
We'll see what we can do.
Is that my bathing suit?
You are so old and weak!
- Are they even still chasing us? - Yes, they're still chasing us!
Name one other person who has this.
- I got him in the dick. - Yep.
What, like when we were drunk or something?
You're dead. You are dead.
"Slam poetry!
Next up is Brad McQuaid.
we made breakthroughs
This is crazy, all these
Not always.
That's a weird time to be Q-tipping.
Mercedes just took my dad that way!
You can’t even see the muthafuckas
I was thinking about the case,
- Yeah. - Yeah.
You're dragging me down. You're really heavy.
- Pirates! Baby feet! - Paper clips! Bananas!
How are you?
What's up, dude?
Move!
so high.
...a slam poem in her honour.
And if that happens, WhyPhy is going viral.
“I’m like a hit it, continue to hit it... ... both physically & emotionally, kind of guy.”
I think I know exactly who he's talking about.
We shoot dicks off here in Jump Street.
Are we going to fuck?
Are we gonna talk about how weird you were today with Dickson?
Well, I heard WhyPhy's coming back in a big way.
It's on now, dawg.
- Hey. - Hi.
- Yeah, yeah. You're welcome, man. - Yeah.
- Really? - Yeah, yeah.
- You did it! Yeah! - Yeah! Yeah!
Safety.
- Nice to meet you. - Worst thing to say.
She seems nice.
Get the fuck out of my office.
Boom, motherfuckers!
I don't know. Maybe the school directory or something.
I'm your bitch.
You guys might want to hold on, 'cause this shit is coming down.
No, it's not the thought that counts. It's fucking taking the bullet.
Come on, man, hook me up.
- Great. - Yeah, maybe we will.
This is fucking bullshit. Shit!
Focus!
- You serious right now? - You...
I'm gonna... I'm gonna split. I'll text you later.
Hey!
Thanks, Mom. Listen, we're undercover, okay?
Do you know how expensive that's gonna be?
Drink, motherfucker! Drink, motherfucker!
- Awesome. - Yes!
You're Dead. You Are Dead.
Don't do it, Leatherface.
- Fuck! Fuck! - Shit!
You can say whatever you want.
Like, a meat Q-tip.
All right? And when I'm with you, it just feels like you hold me down.
What the fuck? It's the same case!
Shit, your trip sucks.
55
My name is Jeff
Nice twist.
We can't waste any more of the department's money!
Look where you're going!
Let's hear it for your Metropolitan City State Statesmen!
You could've gone in a parking lot, you went to the sculpture garden?
You took a bullet for me, man.
You're literally wearing your badge.
Oh, my God.