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Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips
Was that too much?
I
hands down the dopest (poem) I've ever smoked
Don't move. What's in your hand?
What the fuck was that?
...with their eyes as red as the devil's dick. You're busted.
Whaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I only have, like, 50 bucks. I don't think that'll even buy one ticket.
We can go look at some crazy things on the Internet together.
Hi, there. Are you Sandra Danby?
Hi, Ted.
Fucking lingerer.
- We each shot several people. - A lot.
Get your foot out of there.
It might sound weird at first, but just listen.
Yo?'re not dying today, friend.
The phones. The phones.
From what I can tell, you don't notice anything ever.
I've gotta get to a phone. Come on.
- Stop! - Cheater!
And like I just feel like a fat dumb fucking stinky ass turd
And meanwhile, that crazy Northern Lights stuff I had...
hi laura i'm josh williams. hey josh.
We were supposed to be at Red's at noon, man. What if he's gone?
- Really? Thanks man. - No problem.
- Asshole. - I'm sorry, man.
I Wanna Live In Here.
I don't wanna have to do this.
It’s my cat birthday today
Except, if you're a dick your whole life...
Why didn't you smash it on a rock like a normal person?
We should hit up the casino again. It's been a while.
Flush.
Yeah, no problem, no problem.
- I'm in. - Come on!
Tell him to get away from me!
What the fuck, man?
Call me when I can go home.
- Don't worry. Don't tell us what to do. - Inhale it, Chachi. Inhale it.
Fuck. I'm sorry. I thought she'd just go past.
Is it uh huh or uh uh
- Can I have my jacket back, please? - Yeah.
There's one more. I know you'll find it. Take it.
You just got killed by a Daewoo Lanos, Good hunter
This is it, man. This is what your grandchildren are gonna be smoking.
Hey, Mrs. Mendelson.
I ain't fuckin retarded
Ted, you hear him?
What? Fuck James Taylor man.
YA'LL WANNA BUY SOME DRUGS
Fucking lingerer
- Yeah? - Right here.
Only 10 bones more for a quarter.
Dale. You know what? Drug dealers... Let me tell you something.
Sorry!
- Get your leg out of there. Seriously. - I can't.
No, no, no.
For now, this is what we're gonna do.
I just know they'll like you, that's all.
You know what I'm coming back with? With a gun.
Stuff your sorries is a sack
I don't... Normally he's... That's really weird.
Business, for the business man!
THOUSAND PARDONS!!!
-You know you gonna die right? -Yeah
He put a couple of moves on me.
Why don't I just call the Asians and talk to Cheung?
Okay, I'll take a quarter.
Wassup son?
Fucking lingerer man
Dale!
- Shake my fucking hand. - Shake my hand. Okay.
They say, like, “Don't dip the pen in company ink.”
Look what I’m wearing. Kimono dawg
Wake up. Get up. Wake up.
I'm kind of flabbergasted when you say things like that. It's weird.
...and the Super Red Especial Snowflake met and had a baby.
You got it. So, listen, we'll be chilling by noon.
- Pineapple Express. - Pineapple Express.
This airflow that comes from Hawaii and Canada.
Hi.
...and I would be fantastic right now. Instead of looking like this.
- Noon it is, bromosexual. - Nice.
Hey, Saul. I came back for you, bro.
Shit.
We can tie it to an animal, be a diversion.
...but we both can put that behind us like adults.
We need to know about your source.
Honey, we're at the table. No one's going to leave the table.
Wake up.
You're a fucking idiot. I say that with love.
Sounds like a very nice boy.
You fuckhead.
...an Asian guy, in the window, at fucking Ted's house.
...and then tomorrow we could just, like, continue?
You are. You're about to get D'd by the Dale.
...so you would stay off mine. Get off the phone.
Put the pipe down slowly JOE
That's cool. Does she like to smoke weed?
- Yeah, but don't call it that. - Yeah, that's not what it's called.
He sent two guys over here, Budlofsky and Matheson.
- Oh, that sucks. - Yeah.
What did that thing tell you? What are you doing?
You can't even tell.
What you do is you light all three ends at the same time.
Dale?
Teamwork
I can't even light this thing on my own.
Oh, Jesus.
I should not be in this situation, so fuck you.
Time to suck today’s dick. That’s what I’m talking about.
- Did it work? - On three!
You didn't say anything back.
What the fuck's the buzzer for anyway?
Herpes is for life, bro.
Fuck you.
...but I got a lot of feelings.
- Gonna get to the bottom of this shit. - Stop!
Let's get up and go get Saul back. Use it.
One, two...
- Camping? - Yeah.
Oh, man. We made it, guys.
Oh, yeah. Me and my bubbe.
I
- Really? - Maybe it's the same guy.
You okay, man?
- Call it Banana Boat. - Make sure you leave it at weed too.
And for you to come into my house...
Fuck John Cusack Man
It's best if you don't know my full name.
Put your guns down. Nobody shoots.
- It's not bad, huh? - If I close my eyes, it sounds like...
All right, everybody be cool, man. Be cool.
- It sounds pretty good. - It sounds real.
All right, man.
The squirrel'd be up in a tree, they'd think we were.
For real?
Well Lookie Here, Mr. Folgers
Fucking lingerer. - Yeah, totally.
Are you on that meth shit again?
This is the Future.. The future!
You're great, and you're funny...
Don't pay attention to what I'm saying
- My God, are you okay? - I'm good. I'm fine. I'm great.
Petty's Waiter
The guy who designed the Golden Gate Bridge.
Just don't. Don't...
Fucking Pete? He was ex-CIA.
MY REACTION WHEN TRUMP TWEETS THREATS IN ALL CAPS
What an adorable little cop.
I don't know. We should get out of the middle of the road. Come on.
...you can prioritize your life, and you are it, okay?
- I didn't say anything about Percocet. - What the fuck?
What do you gotta say to that?
I found a bloody fork.
You told him I was gonna sell Percocet?
We're gonna fucking kill them all.
Mmm hmm.
Like, on her?
That's a good point.
This doesn't happen to anyone.
I think, “Yes, I'm gonna help you, Dale”...
I bet they can't even triangulate those things.
I saw them kill him.
I'm not a student, so I can say whatever I want...
Beautiful. What's it called?
You trying to figure out dinner? Fish tacos!
Zelensky to the EU and the West
Are you kidding?! You have the coolest job on earth!
Of course. Hi.
lolo uhhuh
Out of her vagina. Remember what you did? What did you do?
...my chillastic couch, and chill out.
Herpes!
...where Angie has a lot of things.
This was Ant
How can I explain this to you differently
Who is Red?
Fuck Joe Flacco Man
You're welcome.
herpes is for life bro
Ugh, I wish
You assholes do exactly what I say...
Oh, nice.
Boring people to death on the radio.