Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

No, no, no. Don't tell me. I want to be surprised.

Yeah. I got nothing. Who's next?

You know I'd do anything for you, right?

- Christian. - Hey!

What kind of shit is this?

- Did you just roll your eyes at me? - No.

You sound like Yoda. Listen, I want you to go home right now.

She's an incurable romantic.

Still no, but hell no.

God damn it! It stings so bad!

And they will swoop down on you

I'll fuck you into a whole 'nother planet,

I don't know. I see the way the women dress around here.

Hannah, where is your family from?

Yeah, well, I'm gonna rent me a DeLorean

I'mma call you!

Hannah, this is my little brother, Eli.

Yeah, you're like the little ugly runt

I'm pretty much cool with anything,

Oh, no, I can't with you,

Well, I thought we'd start with a little bit of rope play.

I hate to throw a monkey wrench

Oh, I got something for you.

Just something to think about.

I didn't lick a butthole!

then Christian Black is your guy.

And for Mai, of course, we have Peking Duck

and I'm currently working on a fifth.

- Who knew? - Everyone.

Nothing happened!

Are you stalking me, Mr. Black?

Well, I'm kind of with him on Taylor Swift.

Because I rolled my eyes.

Oh, my God, it feels so natural.

I'm Eli, like the movie about the book,

and I done been with a lot of hos

Just knowing you care enough to use protection excites me.

Mmm... God, Christian.

You're only gay if you enjoy touching penis.

but you had this Gideon Bible in there and I couldn't fit.

And he ain't afraid to get a bitch pregnant.

and they will have no problem coming down here

Even the one with Miley Cyrus?

Mr. "Oh, let's go for coffee.

I gotta go to the bathroom.

Mmm, but you gotta admit, girl, he is bangin'! Mmm!

Fine, you want me to leave? You want me to leave? Fine, I will leave!

Now, do you know why I'm gonna punish you?

Reload, man! Reload! I told you to reload!

But you're gonna have to pack a bag.

Behind this door is my playroom.

They're delicious. Mmm.

"Boyfriend" makes it sound serious, like I went raw.

- How did you do that? - Come on, you, with me, now.

Big brother almighty!

- No, Mother. - I never raised you that way.

Later I wanna hit it.

- Whip. - Whips.

Oh, really? Let me just get an after-sex mint.

Ooh, look, your Uber's here. All right.

Shit, girl, yeah! Ooh!

but we talk about each other behind each other's back, like,

I don't exactly fit in.

Where are we going?

Did you undress me?

But first you're gonna have to sign

Christian, I've fallen head over heels in love with you.

You mean like white people?

He look like Marky Mark

with that tambourine, Black?

Lindsey Hung, right?

or I'll be forced to punish you.

Are we gonna go on your private jet?

Holy shit! You live here?

I'm gonna spank you six times.

Call me "nigga" again.

or was it like real long, like skinny long?

My sister had sextuplets.

What is that bitch singing about?

at the bottom of the ocean.

a nondisclosure agreement.

Are you gonna spank me? All this build-up is getting boring.

it's what platonic friends do.

- Now we gotta start from scratch! - No!