Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

I'ma lose my sh-- I'ma lose my shit. Stop!

Uh, my day was going okay, but now it's bad.

It's great that you're leaving.

Thank God, 'cause I took French in high school like a ding-dong.

Not tonight. Let's serve it up.

["Psycho Killer" playing]

There's shattered glass and blood everywhere.

I was your best friend.

Unless, maybe he doesn't even know about it.

Should we get ice cream? -Fuck yeah.

I really am quite lonely.

Okay, so are you, Paul.

His name's Dan. Your names rhyme.

...'cause of soccer and everything, and I-- Oh... [stammers] ...you go.

I know someone who does.

[pants] Uh, no. It's fine. The more, the merrier.

and you said, "Oh, she's such a mom."

I just casually asked her to have dinner with me, and guess what?

...which is totally great, right? -Oh, for sure.

Yes, you do. Just tell me.

["Frightening Fishes" by Benjamin Gibbard playing]

I know what you think of me.

I never called 'em. -Oh.

All right, look, Paul, I'm just gonna be completely honest with you...

where you can play cornhole while you have your appetizers.

and I could caption it, "Low-quality pics with high-quality friends."

Turns out he's dead, so not that fun. -How'd he die?

Because I have 30 eyewitnesses

But then you're left with a choice.

I am human Zoloft. -Yes, I know!

Come on in. -Hey, um, I was thinking tonight,

If you can't be real, what are we even doing?