Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

It was, like, the dipshit, uh, douche bag.

Specifically, what homecoming means to me.

- From when we were little? - Mm-hm.

- Oh, Toby. - Are you gonna do anything?

Because I actually heard that Dave & Buster's

- What the shit? - Ow.

when you're not overthinking things, actually having some fun.

We have a date with the periodic chart.

- Seven o'clock? - Yes, 7 is good.

NO! OF COURSE NOT

I'm glad you said that,

- Okay- - okay-

...can't do this.

Mini Stalin, dead ahead.

But these YOLO terrorists will not be tolerated.

- Wes, no, don't go. - Ach.

HOMER: Get me out of this. I'll make it worth your while.

Yeah, except Jess making out with Ryan Jensen,

Maybe I'll, you know...

How could you guys not tell me this whole time that I was your DUFF?

BOY: Wow, she's awesome.

GIRL 2: His senior year is going to suck.

It's all part of the plan?

You know, you'd be bringing me a pizza

Sorry, your profile for what?

that I wrote a few weeks ago.

This old thing? Ha, ha.

BIANCA: Whoa, look at this.

What? No, I didn't. I called you the DUFF.

because you wear the wrong size bra. Boom, real talk.

If it has to do with my hands, I usually pick it up really quickly.

Those were pity Rts

I would've told you, Absolutely nothing.

- Fine. - Fine.

[WESLEY LAUGHING]

would've been enough to make me hide under my bed.

BIANCA: I was nervous, relying on the school Neanderthal,

- This is a... - Hmm. Not the article I want.

So it turns out that Toby's been DUFFing me the whole time.

Bianca, you have to have an actual invite to get in,

and, like, everyone TP'ing Rebecca Cutter's house.

Oh, he's going to town on me, Toby.

You're welcome.

Now there's rumors going around I'm on 'roids.

- Yeah. - Get out.

I agree. That could never happen.

I got my grades up, you got your date. We're good.

But is there a place to get a hot dog here in this mall or...?

High school offers me none of that.

You got a uninvolved

local celebrity to the 40-and-over self-help crowd,

Shit, there's Señor Gomez. I'm failing Spanish.

conjures up feelings of warmth and comfort.

just apologizing profusely

If anything, we're kind of chumps in comparison to you.

I'm not surprised, because it was a piece of shit.

GIRL: Yeah, that's not me.

Okay, I think I'm gonna use the bathroom.

Well, look at it this way.

Three years ago my dad left her, and she did not handle it well.

Mr. Arthur, I'm really sorry. I...

What? Oh, no. Layman, it's just a phrase.

Hi, neighbor-slash-girlfriend.

- Fine. - Dressing rooms are back there,

Yeah. I actually kind of feel nervous about it

Look, you don't have to apologize for anything, okay?

But I Wouldn't like it.

Well, it's gonna blow your mind, but sit on the rock.

Aw. Sticks and stones, B.

Girls, party at my place.

You talk about my son one more ******* time.

TOBY: Cool socks.

because you wouldn't understand what it felt like to be your schlumpy friend.

We've got the whole place. We are just getting started.

- It was all so easy for Wes. - Ha, ha.

I wanna make out with your face.

Looking very handsome tonight.

I don't know why I thought it could be different.

Everything and Everyone can suck it.

- So you asked him out? BIANCA: Yeah.

WESLEY: Ow. - Hmm.

- I'm not gonna high-five you on that. WESLEY: Come on, science jokes.

[CROWD APPLAUDING AND CHEERING]