Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Is there a problem?

Super aggressive. Look, if this is gonna work,

Lighting, dark booth. Got it. What's next?

BIANCA: Holy shit. I was the DUFF.

Let's see. Oh, yeah, what about this one?

- Oh, man, you're so good. - Thank you so much.

Well, I mean, I'm more of a tongue guy myself, but...

Well, people don't know that.

- Hmm? Question? You do. BIANCA: Uh... Heh.

- Well, I know my boobs. - Okay.

but it shouldn't affect how you see yourself.

Not as a Motel 6, Wes.

[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

and whatever the hell else they do to each other nowadays.

but I actually took the liberty of making a reservation already.

Yeah. From the Bible.

WESLEY: You see why I need that scholarship?

Oh, perfect. No more of Bianca's almost-ironic tweets for the day.

This is Toby too.

There you go. Better?

If this was a porn movie,

I'm just saying, I would never call anyone fat or ugly.

[OINKING ON PHONE]

that people make when it comes to toppings?

- I don't know where Toby is. - Come dance with us.

But you're missing the meat of the story.

We got this. Come here. All right.

I wanna be my own person.

Man, I guess I am.

- Attagirl. - I know.

That is so cool.

Antidisestablishmentarianism.

BIANCA: No, no. WESLEY: Touch them.

JDate? You're not Jewish.

Do you wanna see something hysterical? Hold on.

- Finally, acceptance. - Well, we all gotta go sometime.

It's kind of like us right now.

- Ready. - Okay, okay. Lean in.

because in the end, they're meaningless.

No, it's a bratwurst.

- Hey there, Jess and Casey. JESS: Hey

That was an awesome lesson. I'm humiliated.

This school, this entire school, is filled with cyber bullies.

I'm a toppings consultant.

I don't like people thinking of my ex-boyfriend

but now they just annoy the shit out of you?

because I do not subscribe to the American ideal of feminine beauty.

- Okay, here, just rub my shoulders. - Right.

about a month before homecoming.

Achieve your goals.

Don't tell me. Tell Toby.

- Oh. Did we blow a fuse? - I guess we did.

My life is an audition for reality TV.

- A dark booth? Yeah. - Ah! I love it when you talk dirty to me.

WESLEY: Ever been kicked in the nuts?

- What the hell? - You embarrassed?

Ha, ha. It took a few hours.

BIANCA: And, you know, maybe... - No.

- It's a joke. - It's a YouTube video?

Step five: Take a few hits.

What are we, 5 years old?

- You wanna know why? - Yeah.

Hey, Jess. Hey, Casey.

- Mm. Oof! - Ew!

- On a school night? - Yeah, I can do that.

There it is. I gotta say, this is some of my best work.

BIANCA: I love your eyes. They're so... - Just make that go away.

I think I have an idea.

not-so-accidental touching, making out. Game on.

[BOTH LAUGHING]

- Wesley, get the door! WESLEY: Okay, enough, I got it.

Drop them in the box.

No, I didn't, I didn't. Yes, you did.

когда тебе светит еще 1 кредит

Fight on, Blue Devils.

Everything and everyone can suck it.

[STRUMMING GUITAR]

hitting it with someone like you.

Now, that's a school-lunch story. Boom.

[CELL PHONE CHIMES]

Don't we just look so cute together?

You know my boy A.J., freshman on the football team?

We had actual facial expressions.

- Now I know you... - Ha, ha.

BIANCA: In the past, her threat alone

Just the gal I was hoping for.

Oh, God, please, make it...

On again, off again, a thousand times.

BIANCA:And just like that, she became Dottie Piper,

- and I don't really know when... - Honey, stop.

I was feeling, like, a draft over when I was here,

Girls, party at my place. I'm sure you've heard of it.

[CELL PHONE CHIMES]

Looked horrible, by the way, all that reading.

BIANCA: I never knew why I couldn't talk to Toby.

Got it. I'll remember that if you remember no more duck face.

- No duck head. - Duck face.

Hey, Jess. Hey, Casey. Homecoming tickets?

- Is that good? WESLEY: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Put your arm around me. Whoops.

So you'll do it?

Yeah, um, forget about it. Just go home.

- Mom. - Sorry.

And that's him, Toby Tucker.

BIANCA: The world gave me the gift of in visibility,

JESS & CASEY: Hey, Principal Buchanon.

Then came Guy 21. Couldn't shut him up.

Heh. Oh, that's rich, coming from this guy

Well, it turns out the shrubs have bitches

Yeah, just get the food.

I'm gonna give you a lesson.

And then you think.

I'll rip it right off.

And that made me...

Hey, ready to go get down

Oh, is it too formal?

because that's your job as their DUFF.

[IN BRITISH ACCENT] This one goes to 11.

Inspire us. Remember, the pen is mightier than the sword.