Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Of course you don't look old.
Tell your problem.
BOTH: Oh, good.
Do you jerk off?
How about Ariana Skoufis' boy, huh?
Oh, so my brother can tell me what I'm doing is stupid?
Yeah.
I don't know. I don't know.
(ALL LAUGHING)
Alabama, Florida, Texas, New York.
Gus, what's wrong?
Alexander the Great went through Spain spreading his seed.
Okay! Oh!
You vegetarian. One girl.
Come on, let's dance.
TOULA: Okay, okay, okay.
(SIGHS)
No!
There you go.
Okay, here's Ma.
That's not working! That's not working.
GUS: Oh! That's not the plug.
Yes. There you go.
Telephone, telegram, tell-a-Greek.
Yeah, you were my girlfriend.
Not bad.
They asked, but I said no.
All right, all right, we can handle this, boys. Oh, yeah.
Should I bring them in now? Good time to visit?
What are you doing? Nothing.
GUS: What you doing?
I wanted her to think I was cool again.
Yeah, and he gets on his hands and knees, and he's up!
like, a piece of lamb stuck in the back of her throat.
Nicko.
(AUDIENCE MURMURING)
TOULA: Do I speak for all mothers of teens when I ask,
Very good, very good.
I don't care.
He doesn't speak English.
Down, down.
Ma, why don't you empty the tub?
Great.
Yiayia constantly tells me to never ever let a boy touch my poulaki
We're not married?
Did you invite the family?
Yep.
And changa comes from the Greek word tsanda,
What am I getting married for?
(DOGS BARKING)
Mother.
One rule. Don't fight.
(BOTH CHUCKLING NERVOUSLY)
we are all descendants OF ALEXANDER THE GREAT
Of course.
You mean pardon?
Chocolate baklava.
I don't see you!
TOULA: I loved being a travel agent, but in a tight economy,
Like, Fly, little birdy. Wait, no, let me hold your wings.
Oh, please don't lecture me about my daughter.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. (CHUCKLES)
But that's what family does.
They were huge.
These are the colleges I'm applying to, far, far away from here.
Me, too. How do we stop her from moving away?
IAN: You're gonna miss your grandparents' wedding.
It's okay. It's a big day.
Look, it's my fault, too. We're busy.
MARIA: Oh, yes. We're late, we gotta go!
Now?
Ela, Coated.!
Now.
No. I didn't want you to see the house.
Welcome, welcome. Come, let us feed you.
(GROANS) Outstanding.
We just started dating.
(PHONE RINGING)
I have an aunt who always talks like she's got,
(GASPS)
I don't know. But she'll tell me eventually.
Mmm-hmm.
We're gonna roll him over.
You know? Not every day, but sometimes.
It's okay.
Shave everything.
(CHUCKLES)
Oh, is slow.
Want to join us?
When someone asks you how often you jack off.
And this time, I'm doing it right.
Let's go! Put on your hat.
Eh.
I see you.
(INDISTINCT RADIO CHATTER)
Hi.
Sorry, what's your name?
Hi.
GUS: Huh. The Greeks invented Facebook.
you don't need to get married and make babies!
Well, if she gets in.
(EXHALES) That's over.
buH have a very dry mouth.
No.
Oh. Every day of my life is Greek Club.
All right.
Thank you.
Can't wait.
You don't remember?
(WEDDING MARCH PLAYING)
Sit down.
You track me all day.
Okay.
AUNT VOULA: Oh yeah, dose to home.
No, sir.
Guys! All right, break it up.
What do you mean?
Why do parents always say dream big
Oh.
Alexander the Great when he conquered Mesopotamia.
MARIA: Good.
(EXHALES SHARPLY) This family.