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Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips
But fearing their power, Zeus split them into two separate parts,
Worst case, maybe I'll have a little meat.
everyone, really. I...
I met someone who's as perfect in person
why didn't you just leave?
Well, actually, I was just dropping off your, uh, your lady's suitcase.
I can see the steam!
[inhales] Four weeks ago, I met a guy online.
The last time an intern forgot, I almost died.
[cats meowing]
What are you doing here?
searching for their other half, their soul's equal.
- [Josh] No, you don't. [breathing heavily] - Yes, I do.
[Kerry] All you have to do is make sure Tag and the Lins
Hey, babe. I want to introduce you to my parents.
And... and by the way,
[Josh] Before there was Ferris Bueller, there was Peggy Ann McKay.
All right. Come on. [exhales] We gotta go. Don't want to be late.
♪ Her hair, it curls In the depth of the night ♪
Baked potato? I've got baked potatoes.
- Eucalyptus? - Bengay.
Well, I don't know how to show that in a photo.
But here's the thing.
[Owen] Lin family, let's go!
that you have ever read.
maybe you can do something for me in return.
♪ I dreamt last night ♪
♪ Very Merry Christmas ♪
[Kerry] Long gone, Nat. Besides, think of the story you'll write.
even with the three-hour time difference.
Not only were Tag and I best friends until 8th grade,
Forgot my luggage. So I'm gonna...
Oh, thank you, Grandma.
Hey, Joshy!
A lot of guys bet big on China Tire.
♪ Oh girl I don't know all the reasons why ♪
you'll find me at home in Lake Placid, New York, planning my next move.
It's very expensive.
I am so screwed!
- ♪ Merry ♪ - ♪ Merry ♪
♪ As long as the planets are turning ♪
♪ Everlasting Lord! ♪
Okay. The first thing you need to know about Tag
I... I thought that my perfect match was here,
Having sex with her would literally kill her.
There you go. [chuckles]
- [Josh] Good morning. - [chuckles]
Stephen King is too afraid to trick-or-treat here.
Are you saying you don't want to work at the store anymore?
- I'm gonna help her. - It's okay. Focus on...
♪ Say you wanna ride... ♪
Hey, can you do me a favor? Can you give this to Josh
Do I have to mention my Parkinson's?
[Owen] Mom!
and she has seen more ass than a church pew.
- Why? - Because it's a total scam.
For one, you have very nice eyes.
Oh. Okay. All right.
[footsteps approaching]
I mean, that guy is everything that's wrong with Christmas.
Do you even climb?
Natalie. I... I know we haven't known each other for that long...
♪ Anywhere means we're running ♪
♪ I know you can save me ♪
Whew.
Um... Could you just pause for a second? It's a little distracting.
[both men laughing]
I'm so sorry.
- Mmm. So good! - She loves her toast!
I just don't think you're the one to write it.
[clicks tongue] Uh, yeah.
- Oh no. No, I don't. - It was wonderful! [laughing]
Oh.
Someone's here to see you!
Is that my baby?
Just come up!
and I didn't want to risk it.
[Bob chuckles]
Here, look at this.
Well, she's right there.
You've been lifting those weights I bought you. Huh? Yeah!
trust me,
Oh.
[Josh] Oh Jesus.
Sure you don't want to stay the night? We're making a gingerbread house.
- [bartender] Orange juice. Kiwi. - Say what?
- Are you all right? - [exhales]
[Bob grunts]
Okay, you're crazy.
Because this is going to be the most epic love story
- She has a condition. - Um.
[Tag] Okay, so... so you got mad at Josh for catfishing you,
- So, you met the real Tag tonight, huh? - Mm-hmm.
He's gotten more chiseled in the last couple of years.
How do I make it clear
Um. [chuckles]
We talked. [gulps] I made sure... The... the photo!
- [all cheering] - She said yes!
- ♪ Pray for your mercy! ♪ - ♪ Reconcile ♪
and I... I want you to make that rugged unicorn notice you, okay?
- I figured it's the least I could do. - Oh.
with my own speech.
- Someone kind, and honest, and ideally... - [man] Honey?
an insensitive, attention-seeking [inhales deeply] jerk?
My God, honey, you are gonna make a therapist very wealthy one day.
You won't find my article in the bottom of that glass.
Dad, come on.
♪ Who'd have thought That we'd turn our home to hell? ♪
- It's making me miserable. - Oh, I'm sorry. [sucks in air]
Okay.
♪ There's a tale about Christmas That you've all been told ♪
No! That's not what I'm saying at all.
[cats meowing]
[bells jingling]
Grandpa.
He loves that shit.
How could you lie to me? I really liked you.
[text tone]
Hey, bro, why don't you let me and Chels take this?
Thank you.
For years, I've been chronicling my disaster dates
[bartender] No problem.
Good night.
You wanna put your best foot forward.
It's, uh, I mean, there's some gnar... like, gnarly climbing there.
I hate him.