Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

I don't know if I have them.
She's doing the rounds.
[Natalie] Half of you love a great Disaster Date story.
Not the baby Jesus. Don't. Don't. No, no, no, no.
He does that every single, solitary time, even Halloween.
Tag Abbott, he may as well have been Zeus's son...
[chuckles]
my family is pretty intense when it comes to Christmas presents.
this smells exactly like Grandpa.
You said, and I quote, "I wish you were here with me for Christmas."
- ♪ Holy infant so... ♪ - [gasps] Oh!
♪ Her hair curls In the damp of the night ♪
♪ You say you wanna move on and ♪
- ♪ This evening has been... ♪ - Totally consensual.
- Get this off. - Don't undo that, come on.
I got you. One sec, baby girl.
- [Josh grunts] - [Tag] All right, Josh.
I just can't, I'm sorry. I...
Any questions?
Tonight I'll be assisted in the kitchen
[both laughing]
Music prevents stretch marks, Owen.
What kind of psychopath creates a fake profile
♪ Counting the days Been waiting since last year ♪
and he likes his girls the same way.
Two, it snows at the end. Number three, there are presents involved.
[Natalie] No way. You were chubby as a kid too?
Die Hard is not a Christmas movie.
[ethereal tinkling]
No, it doesn't matter what I like.
this might be the most sane thing you've ever done.
- We don't have to... - [Owen] Yes! You remember this one?
Oh! I've never felt more alive!
[footsteps receding]
- ♪ Merry ♪ - ♪ Merry ♪
It's a pretty decent photo of you, though.
I can help you get him.
Uh, I'm gonna show her a grand tour of Lake Placid and the store.
♪ Some nights you're like nothing I've ever seen before or will again ♪
It was me.
What if he finds out I'm engaged to my cousin?
Oh, this is not the date. It's just a warm-up.
♪ Some days it don't come easy ♪
Bear with me. Um... [sniffs]
[driver] 4.9 stars, and I offer snacks.
He knows the difference between there and they are, which you'd be surprised by.
Uh. [laughing nervously]
Why the hell would you do that?
♪ On the corner of Main Street ♪
Okay, okay. Come here. Come here.
Ugh. "Bottom Gun"?
♪ Slow down, that's quite a pour ♪
- ♪ Christ the everlasting Lord ♪ - You're off-key, Dad.
and after spending, uh, the last week with your beautiful bride-to-be,
- Here are your drinks, guys. Get involved. - [woman] Thanks.
Natalie, she didn't come to New York for love. She came here for a story.
if I pretended to be his girlfriend for the holidays.
I mean, you know,
Oh! Well, that is awesome.
[breathlessly] My EpiPen!
height and facial symmetry are repulsive.
Did I fly from LA to surprise him for Christmas?
Yeah, don't you think this is going a little too far?
He ended up being 20 years older than his photos.
So...
Something a little bit more upbeat?
I don't count carbs.
that I never really stopped to look at my own.
we just got so darn excited, and, uh,
Kids in middle school used to ask me which chin I really used.
You do not trust anybody unless he sends you a photo
Good evening. Any questions on the menu?
Well, maybe if I'm helping you with something,
- [Natalie] Do you have a hamper? - [Josh] It's over by the closet.
And what strengths are those?
The common denominator is that it's a bunch of LA assholes.
but I got a pretty great stepmom now, so...
Being seen with you? That would be a huge win.
you would not have swiped on me. [grunts]
I mean...
From my stepmom's side, so that would technically make us step-cousins.
And then, your second. Okay?
[Natalie sighs]
Walden?
[upbeat music playing]
I am not having sex with you.
["Read My Mind" by Golda May playing]
Ah, that's funny, because I didn't know what to think
- [panting] He's gone. - Are you sure?
I think this might be the real deal.
Oh, you're... you're... you're serious.
but I'm pretty sure I qualified for the winter Olympics in Beijing. [chuckles]
- [Barb] It's so good to see you! - [Bob] Honey! Wow!
I've turned my horrible love life into a successful online writing career.
What is this one?
I... I... I don't know.
but Santa's actually kind of creepy when you think about it.
[Natalie] Owen really likes being the center of attention, huh?
And you?
Uh, and I'll be right back. Anyone need anything? No? No? Okay.
[inhales] uh, we just couldn't keep it to ourselves anymore. Um...
- Yeah, try me. Oh! Okay, fine! - No. Oh!
Are you seriously looking for sympathy right now?
- [exhales deeply] - [text tones]
♪ Little Saint Nick ♪
Okay, look, I... I can explain.
Plus, he and my brother would just tease me about it.
But relax, Dr. Foye is the best in town.
I want to avoid mentioning that I'm in a wheelchair.
May I see yours? And can you show me Josh's?
- [Bob] Aw! What a duet! Terrific! - [Barb] What a beautiful voice, Natalie!
[knocking on door]
to meet up with a guy who is literally the polar opposite
♪ It must have been something you said ♪
Oh! Thank God you're not dead.
["Curls" by Bibio playing]
- No! - Yes.
I don't complain.
Shut up. Are you joking?
- [Natalie whimpers] - Now, close your eyes.
And those teeth.
♪ And these are the days that never end ♪
- ♪ Very Merry Christmas ♪ - ♪ Very Merry ♪
We ain't sharing.
The Lin household?
Yeah.
but personally, I find him so inspiring.
[holiday music playing]
I'm kidding. [giggles]
- [indistinct chatter] - [Barb] Oh my...
- Oh. - It was, uh...
So, I decided to come here and surprise him for Christmas.