Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Okay, sir, thank you.

We're trying to meet them, but nobody can come up with any good lines.

[SCREAMS THEN SPEAKS GI BBERISH]

United States Air Force. The hat does give you away.

He was quoted as saying,

- Really? - Yeah.

Stamp collections, pulling chickweed from my dad's dichondra plants.

Military intelligence? There's a contradiction in terms.

SLOAN: Last time, in our last class, we read Chapter 3.

Greetings and salutations to any and all servicemen in the area

First thing I'd like to know is what subject this is.

- Where's that? - The noodles, remember?

[WOMAN, SCRAT, AND SQUIRRELS SCREAMING]

[DREIWITZ AS HAUK] And if you do...

I don't know what to say.

[HELICOPTER WHIRRING IN DISTANCE]

- Give me your hand. - Thank you.

Your friend is next.

Moving on, moving on into the dawn with the dawn-busters, yeah.

I got people stuck in places they haven't even considered how to get out of yet.

There is no such thing as only anymore. Not now, not in Saigon.

[SLOWLY] We found out that we can't find them. They're out there,

A little dignity!

[AS FRENCHY] Oh, Lieutenant Steve.

A woman by the river going,

[AS MICK JAGGER] All right.

- I know it sounds dumb. - I not can do this, Cronauer.

That's pretty much to the point, sir. Not much grey area in this one.

I guess that beach movie really impressed her, huh?

[SOLDIER] I'm with somebody. Don't come bother me right now.

and some sort of social infection that doesn't go away.

But I warn you, you not like it when you get there.

I guess I get inside, hit these air conditioners. I get a little dizzy.

Oh, Mr. Cronauer, we say thank you for your fine teaching about softball.

I'm... She's getting away. Edward, get the jeep, get the jeep.

[AS ELMER FUDD] Thank you, America. It was fun being president.

Oh, no, follow the Ho Chi Minh Trail. Follow the Ho Chi Minh Trail.

And then try and take her into a bed.

Also Elizab... Queen Elizabeth, Liz...

You're a very attractive man, Abersold. Don't think I haven't noticed.

How I’m feeling today

The Mississippi River broke through a protective dike today.

He's left Crete. He's entered the demilitarised zone.

[NORMAL] Tell me what it feels like. [SOLDIER] Fool, it's hot.

- Where do you imagine you're going? - Just gonna get a little something to eat.

Whoa, there, Dick, put the brakes on.

to make every effort to dry them out in the sun before requesting new ones.

They spilled something on your pants, what would you do?

Yes, come, we go.

I've been on a Greek island with women who look like Zorba.

- How the hell you find us, Sparky? - Your jeep.

Stevie Brass in WNSK Radio! PREPARE TO POLKA, KIDS!!!

Коли в вас на роботі завал а ти запізнився на 2 години

- Programming taste. - Programming taste.

Slip me some skin, don't be afraid.

I damn near busted a gut laughing at him. And the troops, they love him.

I don't think you understand me, Sparky. Ahem.

straight to hell

The weather forecast on Radio Studio West

I got something I gotta do.

Sergeant major.

LEVITAN [ON RADIO]: This is AFRS, Radio Saigon.

(Inaudible dialogue) ♪ I see skies of blue ♪ (Inaudible dialogue) ♪ I see skies of blue ♪

Hello, Vietnam, and greetings.

Not enough for the car, yeah.

- I can't, I gotta be back on the air... - You have to meet her today.

Good Morning Roz!

For those of you recovering from a hangover, that's gonna sound just right.

Reinstate the man.

You don't really need me You just keep me steaming on

I'm interested in the girl, not in you playing Dear Abby.

And don't say that the weather is the same all the time here,

Not official news. Far as I'm concerned, it didn't happen.

[IN NORMAL VOICE] Hi. What's your name?

- Three, four. - The left, left, left, right, right, right.

So many things not happen the way you want them.

- Get a job. - Get a job, again.

will resume as scheduled at the Ban Mi Thout Park,

DREIWITZ: Please welcome to the microphone, the lieutenant of laughs,

- Specific introductions.

He's not out till you have both halves of the ball.

Oh, she pour nuoc mam noodle soup with fish ball.

when i get to work

who's in charge of orientation and billeting of enlisted personnel

[IN NORMAL VOICE] What is this demilitarised zone?

Well, wait till you hear it. He's this far from sincerity.

- I hope... - You shut your fucking hole.

- Mr. Cronauer, I must... - Oh, Minh, not now.

I know Americans.

if you're going to be dressing in civilian clothes, don't forget pumps.

[HUMS THE TWILIGHT ZONE THEME SONG]

So without further ado, here's a farewell extravaganza.

SOLDIERS: All right!

[SINGING BEACH BLANKET BINGO]

Would you kindly lower your tone, please?

I'm certain that I'm a Catholic boy, and I don't know when I'll be getting laid.

And my older brother, who be 29 years old, he dead.

Bob likes a big room, sir.

These three were executed shortly after this photo was taken.

Everybody say gook, but it's all right.

[MIMICS TELETYPE MACHINE]

Adrian Cronauer, Gls, a wacky and welcome addition...

I work for a living, airman.

Hey, we got a great show coming your way today.

My boyfriend's back and there's gonna be trouble.

[I GET AROUND PLAYING ON RADIO]

- You gotta tell me where your brother is. - I don't know.

Oh, sir, Walter Cronkite lives in New Jersey.

- And you have to get on the air. - Oh.

That's wonderful.

Patrick O'Ma... O'Malley.

You know, he's really funny. You know, he's like a Marx brother.

Well, then I guess that would make you an Eydie Gorme.

Sir? Do you see anything on this profile indicating an officer?

Yeah, now, then you say, Groovy, yeah.

From England, today, Princess Margaret threw a shoe.

You're not gonna continue this broadcast, are you, sir?

There it is, man, yo!

and should describe the contents of your duffel.

Pick them up by their ears, it doesn't hurt them as much.

If someone in America comes up and says,

Sir! Sir, we have to get some dignity here.

Wait a minute, try this one, try this one.

General likes easy listening. I have to inform you...

Dammit Marty! This will not look good on a resumé!

(Inaudible dialogue) ♪ The dark sacred night ♪ (Inaudible dialogue) ♪ The dark sacred night ♪

[SLOWLY] I heard that.

[WOMAN SCREAMS]

We have to go to Washington to Weather Central to Walter Cronkite.

sir, in my heart I know I'm punny

I'm gonna give you the old chuck on the shoulder now.