Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

At ease. I'm General Taylor.
hello my name is Robin Williams my name is Robin Williams from mrs. Doubtfire Good morning Vietnam and other movies you probably recognize me
who, despite all your requests, will return tomorrow.
We've got our traffic report up there on the Ho Chi Minh Trail.
Okay. Who do we have slated for live entertainment in November?
- You're not gonna last long here, pal. - You can always send me back to Crete.
I've been broadcasting the polkas
The ARVIN Army
Easy, Madge.
That about wraps it up for me, Marty Lee,
[IN NORMAL VOICE] Well, a good polka it is
That's it for Hygiene in the Heat. Tomorrow we'll...
CRONAUER [SINGING]: Here she comes
(Inaudible dialogue) ♪ "I love you" ♪ (Inaudible dialogue) ♪ "I love you" ♪
What's the difference between the Army and the Cub Scouts?
Gooooood Morning Spastic Slaaaags
This will not look good on a resume!
Okay, yeah, well, we'll try and do that if we get the equipment.
What's the weather like out there? [SOLDIER] It's hot, damn hot, real hot.
those personnel wishing to spend Christmas cards home...
CRONAUER: Have you considered a sex change?
Not comfort for me.
The fighting's not in the hills. It's downtown...
Jyd
due to a yearly mail rush at that time.
Do you ever wonder how a young South Vietnamese boy
Sergeant Sloan our teacher. You're not supposed to be in here.
LETS GET THIS SHITSHOW STARTED
ы ы
Thousands of guys wrote in, called in, trying to get you reinstated.
Gonna give ya the ol’ chuck on the shoulder now.
play Sinead Loud OK
And how lucky for me. Thank you very much for playing.
- You can step on crap. I know you can. - Yes, but they can be full of shit, he said.
Whatever it is, I like it.
No, you step on crap. You don't call it to a person.
The card should be no larger than 4-by-5 inches
Wet and cold till 15th of January….it could be warmer
We've got a deejay that the men dearly love.
Hotter things is my shorts.
[AS WITCH] Now, little GI, you and your little Toto too.
(Inaudible dialogue) ♪ They're really saying ♪ (Inaudible dialogue) ♪ They're really saying ♪
It's Hanoi Hannah.
TAYLOR: He made a mistake. DICKERSON: Mistake, sir?
We've got a mounting crisis in this country.
Where am I gonna take requests? Where can you call from?
- She say it's a little spicy. - A little, yeah.
GOOOOOOD MORNING CRENDER!
Cowgirls are called gals.
one of A.C.'s favourites.
Who can tell me who sang the song My Guy?
I Left My Heart in San Francisco, of course, Moonlight in Vermont,
GARLICK: I can't, sir. CRONAUER: You don't understand.
And this one is brought to you by our friends at the Pentagon.
You're in Southeast Asia now, pal. You got your cushy little assignment.
Hey, hey.
Walter, what's the weather like?
- Not friends. - Of course.
It just came down the pike. You're back on the air, sir.
Phan Duc Tho!
Hey, there you are, Cronauer.
[IN NORMAL VOICE] Who's that? [AS FRENCHY] It's your old pal Frenchy.
Bookworms, Headquarters Support Activities Saigon
- As you have suggested, give and take.
for my good friend Frenchy.
You just get him out.
Carry on, Montesque. Carry on.
A man does not refer to Pat Boone as a beautiful genius if things are all right.
[SOLDIER] I'm in a phone booth out in the DMZ. I'm trying to call you right now.
I don't know where they are. I don't even know where am.
Listen, if you have any problems here now, you come see me.
By the food and flower vendors where you burn your mouth on the noodles.
GOOOOOOD MOOOOOORRRRNING Neeeeew Hire claaaassss!!!
due to luggage lost on transport carriers.
Hey, 12, please. Um...
All right.
Hey, Staley! Eat a bag of shit, you suck!
TUAN: You can buy me lunch, but please forget about my sister.
[IN NORMAL VOICE] What music do you like? Little Anthony?
Oh, picky, picky. Let's go, Edward. Yeah, the chase.
(Inaudible dialogue) ♪ Of people going by ♪ (Inaudible dialogue) ♪ Of people going by ♪
- What? I was there. - Airman, you know the rules.
He's read unofficial news. What's he gonna be like in six months?
Time to rock it from the Delta to the DMZ.
Hey, fellas, how's the cough-drop business?
I wouldn't buy an apple from the son of a bitch,
But not before his humour cost the lives of three very fine individuals.
Hello, hey. Well, the gang's all here, huh? Ha, ha.
You come out.
There she is.
Go into conference. That point. That fence.
The men all hate Hauk. They want Cronauer back.
How would you do that?
Former Vice President Richard Nixon's in town.
[CHUCKLES]
GARLICK: I learned enough about radio stations.
[SINGING] Puff, the Magic Dragon Living by the tree
- Where are you come from? - Queens. Bayside, Queens.
More dire need of a blow job than any white man in history.
I want you to play this.
I mean, the man's not funny. I know funny and he's not funny.
CRONAUER: What, sir? - Oh, my God.
[EFFEMINATELY] They're ruby slippers.
Hey, you two Earl. What about couple beer?
[IN NORMAL VOICE] Is it a little too early for being that loud? Hey, too late.
Second Covid shot done, not feeling any side affec......
No, I'm actually hungry.
[ENGINE TURNING]
Got some songs going out right now to a couple of guys
Hi. How's Lynn doing?
. .
- I'm not going on. - What do you mean, you're not going on?
(Inaudible dialogue) ♪ So pretty in the sky ♪ (Inaudible dialogue) ♪ So pretty in the sky ♪
Yeah! Run, run, run!
Five-thirty, it's very early. I may have to hurt you.
[CAR HORN HONKS]
Lieutenant Schneer...
Good Moring Vietnam
[BLOWS WHISTLE]
Aw, no. Ha-ha-ha.
I'm the tallest hog in the trough around here.
[IN NORMAL VOICE] We're gonna hit some songs at you now.
[IN NORMAL VOICE] You're here, good to see you.
and Third Man Theme on the Kirk I nternational...
[AS GOMER PYLE] Yes, I am. Surprise, surprise, surprise.
CRONAUER: So this is the country where they grow rattan love seats.
I just remain reticent.
- Is he all right? - No, Phil, he's not all right.
Well, actually, it's a little more than just a hobby.
Those are the guys that are dying.
and they could power a small New Hampshire town.
Gonna give ya the ol’ Chuck on the shoulder now
- This one's a better one. - No. No. No need.
keep the PC on the QT
[BOTH SPEAK IN VIETNAMESE]
Can you envision some fairly unattractive alternatives?
Reader's Digest is considering publishing two of my jokes.
Captain Hauk sucks the sweat off a dead man's balls.
Goooooooooood morning Viet Nan
This news isn't official. That comment is too sarcastic.
You know Puff the Magic Dragon? Will you sing it?
- How would anyone see you fall? - No, no, no. Not literally falling down.
Hey Stop snoring
An Loc? Shit.
[SOLDIER BLOWS WHISTLE]
And I'm not used to girls being that quiet unless they're medicated.
Weather out there today is hot and shitty
- You wanna take the ball? - No.
- Okay. - I'm...
SOLDIERS: Yeah!
How would you describe your testicles?
CRONAUER: Okay, everybody, let's play ball!
What is a lakai?
- That's a deal. - It's a deal?
[OXEN MOO]
NIXON: They're soft, they're shallow
God. Nude photographs of Walter Brennan.
You were my friend.