Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

I'M SORRY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE ASKED.
WHAT ELSE DO YOU CALL "HOUSE JOBS"?
YOU'VE GOT THAT REALLY GOOD, STRAIGHT, SHINY, HARVARD HAIR.
BECAUSE NOTHING SAYS REFRESHMENT LIKE A PHOSPHATE.
I KNOW! WHO ARE THEY TO JUDGE?
HER ROOM? WHEN? WHEN SHE'S GONE.
YEAH, UH, YOU KNOW, JUST FORGET IT.
COMING THROUGH.
HELLO THERE. HELLO, I'M LORELAI GILMORE.
WELL, YOU SHOULD. I'VE UNEARTHED SOME SHOCKING STATISTICS.
OKAY, ARE WE CALMING? ARE WE LESS FREAKED?
I HOPE YOU DON'T LOOSE POINTS? I HOPE NOT.
STILL NOT FUNNY.
FAUVISM.
WHEN I LEAVE WHEN?
THAT I DECIDED TO MAKE AN ADMITTEDLY DESPERATE ATTEMPT
EARS? WHAT?
OH, MY GOD! HONEY, COME HERE.
* IF YOU'RE OUT ON THE ROAD *
Hello, Gilmores, this is Darren Springsteen, how are ya?
NOW, WHAT ARE SOME OTHER MISTAKES?
DOES EVERYONE HAVE THE SAME G.P.A? HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE?
BECAUSE I WAS ABOUT TO HEAVE SO, I CAME HOME TO HEAVE.
IT'S JUST THAT AROUND HERE, THE HARVARD BRAINWASHING STARTS IN THE WOMB.
AY. AY. AY. AY.
TOLSTOY? TURGENEV? GOGOL'S MY THING RIGHT NOW. "DEAD SOULS."
OR ON THE TRAIN COMING HOME TO SEE YOU,
I'LL MAKE A NOTE IN MY PALM PILOT.
OH, THEY WANT A PICTURE.
DON'T SAY IT AGAIN. ZOLTAN KEMENY. ZOLTAN KEMENY.
WHAT IS THIS? THAT'S MY QUESTION.
* YOU NEED ME TO BE WITH YOU *
AND FINANCIAL SECURITY IS NOT JUST ATTENDING COLLEGE,
THAT'S FANTASTIC, HONEY. YEAH.
YOU HAVE NEWSPAPER STUFF TO DO, RIGHT?
THERE'S LITTLE PEOPLE AND EVERYTHING.
WHO WE KNOW IS MORE QUALIFIED.
JACK, JENNIFER, THIS IS LORELAI AND RORY.
[ High-pitched voice ] HELLO, THIS IS RORY GILMORE.
THIS IS THE CUT-DOWN VERSION -- FROM THE LETTER "A"
THE HARVARD POLICE WILL HIT YOU WITH AN ATLAS
AND OVER MY DEAD BODY IS KATE HUDSON GETTING YOUR SPOT.
"DEAD SOULS" AND A REALLY BIG GLOBE.
AS LONG AS THE ICE CREAM'S MADE THE OLD-FASHIONED WAY.
GET ME A HAM ON RYE, MUSTARD, NO MAYO.
JUST BEGINNING THE STRESSFUL PROCESS OF APPLYING TO COLLEGE.
I HAVE THIS COLLECTION OF ANTIQUE FARMING TOOLS
RORY, ARE YOU UP? IF NOT, GET UP!
* AND THEN YOU NEVER SEE TOMORROW COMING *
MAKES KILLER CHICKEN. HE STICKS A LEMON UP ITS BUTT.
WHY? DO YOU THINK IT MIGHT LEAD TO HARDER STUFF --
BECAUSE APPARENTLY THAT'S ALL WE CAN THINK OF.
YOU'RE ON. GREAT.
THE APPLICATION'S NOT FREAKING ME OUT ANYMORE.
KIRK, I TOLD YOU TO GET SOMETHING DECORATIVE TO COVER IT.
YOU'RE BEING MODEST. YOU DON'T KNOW ME, DO YOU?
ARE TOO "BY THE BOOK," THAT SAYS SOMETHING WE DON'T LIKE.
WE'LL TALK TOMORROW, PARIS. WAIT!
WELL, IF PISTOLS ARE DRAWN, WE'RE DUCKING.
DOWN THE MIDDLE OF THE STREET. I'M TELLING YOU!
ON THE CHAIR. WHAT TIME IS IT?
"RORY, GET YOUR NOSE OUT OF YOUR GOGOL AND GET OVER HERE!"
MMM, WE LOVE THE KENNEDYS.
v
TO USE A SPACE FOR A SPECIFIC FUNCTION,
I'M NOT ON THE CONVEYOR BELT.
YOU CAN'T, I'M FREAKING OUT.
I WISH IT CAME WHEN I WAS READING "DEAD SOULS."
JUST CRANK A MESSAGE AT THE FEEDBACK. OH, JEEZ.
I DO KNOW ISTANBUL IS CONSTANTINOPLE,
LIKE YOU'D SAY "FARMER JOHN" OR "THE BUTCHER LAZAR WOLF"?
REALLY? 'CAUSE I COULD SIGN THE CHECKS TOMORROW.
THANK YOU SO MUCH. IT DID A WORLD OF GOOD FOR HER.
YOU NEVER GAVE LANE A CUT-OFF TIME.
WITH THE DOT-COM BUST AND THE JOB MARKET DWINDLING,
CHOPIN. PATIENCE --
BREATHTAKING.