Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Did you empty out my purse?

They're already in their suits, waiting to be buried.

The FBI will confirm that you had no contact with Eleanor Green prior to the election.

Is anyone trying to figure out what happened with the system?

(TV continues in background)

What? And Indiana? You're sure?

And now, voting with confidence.

Wait a second. Do you think anybody remembers the issues?

and subsequently discovered that she was heavily involved in the use of barbiturates and cocaine.

- Hi. - Eleanor, is that you?

One of those pump things with gasoline. You throw it all over their face.

And if I may reiterate some of the comments of Senator Mills

Recently Delacroy had to dismiss an employee, Eleanor Green,

Politicians will say anything in the world to get elected. Maybe I'm jaded.

- Where do you do your writing? - Usually on the back of a napkin, sitting in a bar.

As C.E.O. of Delacroy, James Hemmings lovingly watched his stock rise.

it's like wanting to get laid and forgetting to bring along the woman.

- How many does it take to make my point? - (laughter)

Oh, and over 400 just for core White House staff.

(Jack) Eleanor became his producer,

By the way, you're not the President. Happy Thanksgiving.

(whispers) Tom. 60 seconds. OK.

- It's a Mr. Potato candidate. - (laughter)

- You wanted to see me. - Yeah.

- Oh, none of my business. - It is.

- That's not good. - (laughter)

Mr. President, we have that luncheon speech followed by a White House meet-and-greet.

(man) This story might fall under the heading of one thing leads to another.

(man) On September 2nd something very, very unusual happens.

- For God's sakes. We got some real trouble here. - ...and the airlines...

When you have a political campaign that costs $200 million,

Those wigs, it's kind of nice.

Tom, t-t-two guys broke into my hotel room. I don't know what to do.

Democracy held hostage.

- (crowd) No! - The same way we pick a jury.

No, he said stuff to me. Like, what am I gonna say back?

- 800. - (woman) L?

- Return to your podium. - It was a mockery a long time before I came.

(Tom) Oh, the house is so close to the street.

Look at this old C-SPAN. Congress is in session and no one's there.

and that is the Capital Beltway.

(Tom) God bless.

They're good eating once you get past the tumors.

I thought I was President of the United States till Eleanor talked to me.

for Mick Jagger, just to say, This is your baby!

What's new? He used to do that during my act!

You understand the ramifications. Do you want to put over 1,000 employees out of work?

to develop a fountain pen to write upside down in space in zero gravity.

- Sorry. - (laughter)

(Eleanor) He's calling a press conference at 11 tomorrow. He's gonna make the whole thing known.

says, Why did you have your hair cut? I don't know.

- (Tom) Are you tired of the Democratic Party? - (cheering)

He's in the debate?

All candidates who demonstrate seriousness of purpose and significant support

- What? - (Tom) Cold.

They've gotta go do TV shows to explain to people what they're not doing while they're not there.

The poor have no advocate, because the poor can't afford a lobbyist.

At 17 years old, I beat up a guy.

I'm gonna make a phone call.

Over the course of the next week, Dobbs mentioned this four more times.

which indicates that his message cuts across political lines.

All right, go to the airport. You go to BWI private terminal.

When was the last time any human being, any American, watched the debate and went:

Harkin's speaking about an amendment to a budget bill. It's empty.

I know, we'd lose a certain amount of people there. But Chicago, the dead vote.

We don't have time to keep playing this game.

However, Dobbs became upset when he learned that Monday would no longer be re-runs.

We're talking about freedom of religion. Occasionally, religion crosses over.

(man)...speech today will give some insight into the Eleanor Green situation.

- Hello? - Tom? Tom?

I'll back up now for harassment reasons.

I'm shaking it up there.

Please. I've played in clubs for years.

It's gonna work like a charm. Don't worry about a thing.

They thought I was wild in the karaoke? Watch me in the next two weeks.

- Just let me take care of it for you. - I got it. I got it!

When the dubbed versions come in I need to see the contracts.

(woman on radio) Exit polls are very close.

- Perhaps voters are keeping their voting choices... - (clattering)