Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

For the antioxidants

We test a lot of urine.

Do you want to give Michael your urine?

I did not become a Lackawanna County volunteer sheriff's deputy to make friends. And by the way, I haven't.

When my friend asks me to give him a ride back to compton late at night

Oh, hey, Stanley. I was just doing an impression.

that involves suspicion or testing of any kind.

"I can test anyone randomly, and I have chosen you randomly." "That's not random." Okay, eeny, meenie, miney, moe, is random.

We just need urine, sir.

and I've decided to make you official security supervisor of the branch.

No…It’s Tenacious D

Well, you have, because being a narc

What does that mean to a United States law enforcement officer?

This year more people will use cocaine than will read a book to their children.

What I tell myself when I drink wine during Hell Week... It’s for the antioxidants

When you sign your job application,

When you tell Jason you have loaded the van.

Do you think it's possible that maybe you could have had some drugs

Two nights ago, I went to an Alicia Keys concert

Thank you, Michael.

But that's illegal.

Good. Thank you, Michael.

But you know what?

A cup could find its way under the urine. It might be an accident.

And you all failed. Miserably.

I did not become a Lackawanna County volunteer sheriff's deputy to make friends. And by the way, I haven't.

i cant wait to jim i swallow

No, just... Is something wrong?

One of those people will be dead from drug use

I don't think Michael's ever done drugs. I don't know if anyone's ever offered him any.