Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

* Day like today *
It should not exist,
then called four people, then fainted again.
I thought you understood.
That's not true.
Really? Really? After what I just said about the bathroom?
As long as it's fun.
- Yikes. - I bowed out of my lunch meeting
Mm-hmm.
Rumble of lumber trucks.
Oh, God, Mama.
Right, with the shawl and the stove pipe hat and the string tie.
Uh, I'll be by tomorrow at 10.
standing around the Marais District
anyhow, this is, uh,
Then they put you on a boat and row you out to sea...
I've been having an affair.
I had no idea it would be anything
in a job you hate.
who would explore this brave new world with me.
I had three joints in my wallet.
- I am a mother. - Great. We'll use that.
after three glasses of champagne
Well, I have the brisket.
Upper West Side? Really? Where?
It sure did.
And you said yes.
We got the rabbi!
and you sit there for four hours.
Why did he leave?
* Pass me by *
Oh, my God. Is she pregnant?
Next week. Why not?
to see you tomorrow night?
So what if you're never going to be a stand-up comedian.
Do you know I've seen her twice
I shuffle paper around,
It's about Madison Avenue's marketing men
This is not what you think.
- Hello. - How's the brisket?
Just take your things and leave, Bruce.
Nobody touches my Pyrex …especially on my birthday!
The next act up
I'd say "Pass the fucking salt."
* And they want to know how *
it's supposed to be fun.
Not true. There are French whores
Best buildup since Iceman Cometh.
just like I know that unless I somehow get rich enough
Bob Newhart: You've seen one, you've seen them all.
* If you come on a turtle, you can park it *
It's Yom Kippur. I'm supposed to be fasting,
No.
What moth?
* For losin' the blues *
But that's not a reason to leave, right?
about Jewish girls in the bedroom?
You're right. Bangs will help.
We're very excited.
because I work during the day,
* I'll tell the whole darn world *
I'm going to wear a beret.
It's not a contest.
We need to talk about the baby.
Leviticus. Whatever does not have fins or scales,
I have to leave.
- Shit. - Seriously,
Jerry: Good evening, Mr. Maisel.
Hey, why don't you talk about it?
You don't have the shawl?
waitress: Coming right up.
You guys ever gonna tale a broom to this place?
It's like a dream...
Uh, sure.
I've been crying, and my face is all puffy,
That was Misty Dream, ladies and gentlemen.
* On a wonderful morning like this *
* That the whole human race *
I'm talking dry cleaners to the Klan,
Don’t pick a weak man
Borrows. It's no big deal.
Lenny Bruce.
Peggy Lee: * I got me ten fine toes *
to that fancy goyische college,
Joel.
Our daughter is sick.
And I'm not naive. I know that men like stupid girls.
* Or a frog who loves to sing *
Th-That was just... That was just something
Walk of shame.
- It's how it's done. - Oh.
Man: See, the eternal war is here.
Po Po Po Po Power with BEARGLOVE!!!