Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Croissant emoji. Anyone raise... raising your hands?

Hi, I'm Allison Scott. And we're here today with James Franco from Spider-Man.

- Mary Tyler Moore? - No.

Look man, I didn't go to yale so I could work 12 hours a day

- We'll finish talking. - Yeah, yeah. Okay, go.

I'm not having shit besides a fucking panic attack.

- I googled murder. - You googled murder?

Last time I went to the bathroom, Jay,

It's a promise, Allison.

And then your mommy said, Just do it, already,

No, I disagree with you. That sounds terrible.

- This is fun! - This is great.

Oh, yeah. The donuts, they call to me.

- Oh, that was really sweet of you. - Thanks.

Ben, it's me. Can you come? 'Cause the baby's coming. Can you come?

'Cause you, for some insane reason,

Is that the baby on that one right there?

Don't put this on me!

We don't want you to lose weight. We just want you to be healthy.

- Yeah. Yeah, ka-ching. - We're in.

but it sounds to me like she's crowning. Is that right, Deb?

I'm nervous, too. I'm really nervous.

I can't do that to our baby. That's the first thing it's gonna see.

- We're gonna sing Happy Birthday now. - Yeah.

Me not wanting to do this alone isn't enough of a reason

So what happens now? I don't know how this works.

What about you? Do you want to go to India?

You wanna go to the shadows? Go to the shadows

- You're at your computer. - Mmm-hmm.

I'm just jerking your chain.

I swear to God, man.

I thought you went to Santa Monica City College.

Yeah. I did. I read three of them, actually.

No, not at all.

You're right. I'm so sorry.

- Are you sure? - I'm 100 % sure he's not cheating.

We can just borrow yours. Is that okay?

Don't worry about gaining weight.

You know, the best thing for a hangover is weed.

Seriously, guys, let's say I want to launch today.

Okay. All right, bye.

That Feeling When Spider-Man 3 Starts in 8 Minutes

They're all on the payroll. They're all sucking the teat!

Yeah, that was brutal.

'Cause I want to rip your fucking head off because you're so fucking stupid!

I wouldn't be mad. I don't get mad.

We don't have the heart to tell him it's herpes.

I like margaritas

Remy Remington: You're gonna lose your helmet. You're gonna lose your pencil. You have no more Hop-Hop, no more TV, no more toys, no more nothing.

Okay, first of all, it's not my situation. It's our situation.

- Here we go. - Okay. Okay.

I don't even know what to say. What do you want me to do?

I'm so sorry I haven't called.

Dude, they got the top 10 group shower scenes!

she doesn't even know who the fuck I am, that's a disaster.

- I'm struggling with it right now. - What am I doing?

I mean, get in and get out. Get on with your day, you know?

I mean, you've put on like, eight pounds, nine.

Now I get to start all over again!

- Twenty. - And then weigh that much.

If I didn't care about these things,

You can't... Steely Dan would never even have a chance.

The sweater make’s You look fat

You can't take anything seriously!

California, eh?

Just another day at the office

I would just like to say, Fuck You Hormones!

I'm breathing like James Gandolfini over here.

We can't go, dude. Sorry.

Oh, this is a better energy.

Old pregnant bitches running around

- How could you not tell them? - They're not gonna know.

I think it's Matisyahu.

because we had a little debate on the conference call with New York about you.

- It's just gravity. - Well, that's true. Everyone knows that.

that no one else has thought of already.

tighten it back up

- Because this is serious. - No.

So I listened to the most literal translation of that and I just did it, already.

You mentioned that. It's nice.

It's a boy, buy some blue shit!

- Is he depressed? - You depressed?

You embarrass yourself.

- Bye. Thanks again. - I'll see you. No, I'll see you later.

That's right. The ancient Egyptians fucking engraved

Wow, you managed to turn Steve Carell into an asshole.

You know why she just rejected me?

Hey. I have a really good idea.

You're the one that got dressed up like a cholo on Easter to come to this party.

Why? Come on. Come on, just do it. Deeper.

- I don't know, six months or something. - Seven months.

Don't go there. Okay? Help me stay relaxed.

- Thank you. Awesome. - No problem.

It's gonna be fine. Right?

Oh, it's fine. Hi, I'm Ashley.

Hey, Chief! Don't let the door hit you in the vagina on the way out.

You know, we got ourselves into this situation. We kind of have to.

You know what movie I just saw again the other day, which is fucking, like,

I mean, granted, psychology’s only a hobby of mine

You need to come now because the contractions are happening,

That's weird to say, but it makes me feel better.

My job is to get that baby out safely.

We should put this on YouTube. Shut up.

I don't understand the young talent in this town!

- And I would love to get it for you. - No.

Okay. Have fun.

Well, could... Can I get your number? I mean, I don't...

Hey Clint; don’t let the door hit you in the pussy On the way out, you bitch!

I don't really know yet what that love means, you know.

, i'm ready for my old age close up yes boing snok snok i'm retired and retired and reinstated yes snok how old do you think i am 189? 230? yes i am 2998 years old george thanks for letting me be boing good riddance you're very welcome as old as i am lived to 145 years you know the retirement suits us like cankdi in a pie with snok snok yes faye you grandmal seizdure!

She's, like, naked that whole fucking movie.

To let you know that I've decided to keep the baby.

Your face smells like an old man's balls.

Do not make fun of me. Okay? I am hormonal.

I'm gonna call him right now. You're doing so great.

- I can't. - Oh, why?

I'm really sorry about all that. That was really inappropriate.

But it only comes out right before the baby's gonna come,

It's pat content. I'm bot cheating or anything

with the idea that you can take care of me and the baby

Maya Beach Club Be Like….

I didn’t do shrooms in vegas

All we need to do is think of a new, better idea

He like the way you stick a finger in his ass

I don't think I would have wanted to have a baby for like,

No, you can shoot the waiting room. That would be great.

99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 9999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999

Dude, it's real whether or not you read those books.

Yeah. I got an appointment with a trainer. I can't cancel it now. He'll charge me.

Okay, say, you know, before you're married and have children,

But I've made myself available to his patients,

- Isn't that nice? - I think it is.

- This is scary. These are our children. - Mmm-hmm. Mmm-hmm.

ok, the interview is at 11:00 and the tv spot is at 4:00 ok now one thing to remember (clicks tongue) shropshire! i'll remember thanks. and we now cross live to (clicks tongue) shropshire! bridget jones!

Now that's how you get pinkeye

- Right. - Yeah.

So you're not even gonna tell them?

- Breathe like this... - No, no, no, no.

bitch you're so lucky, I cant even tell you how much lucky you are.

You wanna hang out with guys that look like the shoe bomber, it's all on you, man.

I don't know. Are they mad? What have they been saying?

Did we have sex

Okay, take care. Peace.

Karen is such a fuckin liar

- Don't taunt her. Come on. - Here.

who's filling in for vik jekumar? kate cook.

- Yeah, hello? - Hi.

- Congratulations, Daddy! - We got a beautiful little girl!

- Oh. I love you, Ben. - I love you, Debbie.

Po Po Po Po Power with Bearglove

We both look good in gold.

- Why? - Because your face looks like a vagina.

We said no wives.

You know, one, you know, little...

Your old ass should know better than that.

Christopher walken

That's exactly right.

How are things at Butt-Fucking-Ham Palace?

You two are never allowed to be in the same room ever again.

- What? - That fucking stuck-up bitch.

All the problems are the same, but it's...

- Oh, fuck! - What?

That was just ketchup.

And they wanted it to be a very special experience.

If you want a special experience, go to a Jimmy Buffett concert.

no pills, no powders

He spelled coming wrong. Oh, it's cum...

That we didn't.

I like the way you move.

Yes. We'll take it.

Ow, ow, ow, ow.

- No, no, no. Not like this. - No, it's fine. It's fine. Just keep going.

What the fuck is she doing at the club?

Saffy is a freak of nature

I mean, until now.

You know, I can do whatever you want. I can get in there.

But if you shave, then you have to pay all five of our rents.

Oh, great. Thank you so much. Oh, my God. I'm so glad you're here. Thank you.

You know what? I love your broach.

Three months. Fat in the face, jowls, fat ass.

Yes, they love each other. Because that's what you do.

You shouldn't take it so lightly.