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Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips
- Nice to meet you. - Nice to meet you, Matthew.
So I went to a meeting.
What?
Alright, this is uh... This is us.
Oh, the one you waited for 10 years. That right guy?
I want you to do nothing.
I don't think she needs to know
I'm just gonna say you're mappy.
Hopefully not here.
Y-y-you're just gonna go?
♪ I'm oblivious oh ♪
I think... I think it's a little bit weird
Yeah, you know, just take a night
So either you're stupid or deep down inside you don't want monogamy either.
that can go to Europe and use that room.
You know... that... I mean, that's ridiculous.
It's weird to look at you for this long.
Goodnight - Surf Tight
I didn't end up going to med school.
Helen Keller about water and everything else is amazing.
I know, I... I right. I mean, and yet here I am like wanting... just now.
Top shelf, bro, because we're rich as shit now.
Maybe have a kid.
- Okay? - You've been playing house.
Mr. Sobvechik will not be joining us.
Um... Ah, I mean... real minute?
[both groaning]
I'm telling her not to have sex with you! Sorry.
Oh, that's... It is good stuff.
16 times.
- I'll show you, right now! - Prove it.
♪ You know it's not too late... ♪
Matthew! Hello!
For teaching me how to love someone.
I've been getting his second fucking servings.
What? Well, and then she's like...
[grunts]
Everybody play.
...it doesn't change what I'm doing.
- I was thinking. - Oh, yeah?
Yeah, of course you love it.
Where are you?
You know, get out of these wet clothes.
off a powerful drug.
...last chance to ditch med school
only things that can only be perceived as sexual.
Fuck me then ignore me. Nice one, Jake!
You guys made it, huh?
Look at me, okay? I know you love teaching.
I'll talk to Lainey and see what we can do.
You gotta trust me.
- Will this help? - Yeah. Ooh, that's do it then.
You fucked my best friend.
Upstairs, downstairs. Right?
[instrumental music]
I'm sorry the doctor's not available right now. May I take a message?
Respond to that booty text I assume, right?
♪ Like a kite ♪
- Fucked up his life a little bit. - ...what it was.
Oh, come on, Lainey.
- Do we really have to... - No, we don't.
...putting this conversation off for a while.
- Just listen to it. Let me get through all of it. - I won't.
Okay? Here. Come on, sit down.
Happy Hanukkah. Wherever the fuck you're into.
That was not a Chris Smith gift, okay?
Matthew!
Actually, it's, uh, it's Henry's.
Madame Butterfly.
Okay, so you're a womanizer.
Uh, alright, drive safe.
Yeah. Obviously they get upset
My love is conditional.
I'm not... I have not lied! I have...
Oh, my God.
No, I've never met anybody
- It's Avocado. - No. Can't do that.
- Okay. - I can't take off work.
Look, once I come to the realization that I'm with...
So, maybe... we gotta just be friends.
[grunting]
- What is your excuse? - Hmm.
- I don't wanna get the phone. - Okay.
Well... uh, now, Jordan, uh, she's my guest.
She broke up with me anyway. I'm cured.
What... a weird thing to say out loud.
Now, something's gonna happen. Let's get outta here.
over there just to see if it's him?
♪ You're my one and only woman ♪
Cigarette truck. Never mind.
Oh, baby, what did you do?
I have chlamydia. Okay, I was joking!
Oh, oh, Lainey. Oh, fuck.
It's like kissing with your entire body.
I mean... just the right tinge of danger.
I know. But now they have this whole sex thing.
- No. - You don't? Okay, great.
- Oh, good. Oh, my God, good. - What're you guys talking about?
Come on, that's bullshit. Not even when you masturbate?
- That's psychotic. - Mm. Thanks.
[instrumental music]
Well, you have lost your water.
What?
[grunts]
He's just not thinking about it the same way, you know.
Mm-hmm. Dr. Sobvechik will see you now.
I just... I Facebooked you because I thought...
Shit, I'm not available then. Oh, well, I tried.
I do have HPV though
real estate that could be occupied by a real option, okay?
- Come here. - Excuse me.
[cellphone vibrating]
- I haven't. - Let me introduce you. Emma?
but I thought I was gonna be more along
Pollock. Ooh.
that was what I wanted to hear, yes?
I don't know what that whole thing
Oh. What are you doing?
- Yeah. - Bro, you're welcome. You're welcome.
♪ I'm standing in the wind ♪
- Bye now. - Thank you.
Are you saying I'm crack cocaine?
- Yeah. - That's pretty great.
in relationships anymore.
Well, we can talk about it.
[laughing]
Okay, yeah, so, uh, I've been seeing this girl Thea, alright?
either way, mazel tov.
Yeah, but that was that... that's why I... I, yeah.
Sobvechik! It's like enough!
She seems...
Oh, I gotta go. Chris, I'm so sorry I'm leaving.
You sure you don't want to come to brunch? With me and your mom?
- Who? - It doesn't matter...
- I'll take some. - Great.
Well, you can still get the phone.
with my best friend as I possibly can.
Yes, um... sorry. It's Lainey. Only my father calls me Elaine.
- Duh. - Grody.
- Huey Lewis. - No, it's Robert Palmer.