Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

- Wives and family and stuff? - Yeah. I mean, not children.

thought it'd be something worse.

(Yes, I'm lying)

No. I've done fuck-all and never will because he's too good for me.

I may not always love you

(From DJ booth) Bye bye baby, baby goodbye

(Daisy) What is it?

Oh, fine. Nice to meet you, Jack.

(Eva Cassidy: Songbird)

- (Music stops) - Yeah, erm,

Yeah, sure, sure.

- Ah, my sister lives in Wandsworth. - Oh.

NOT REALLY! ABSOLUTELY NOT! WE CANNOT AND DO NOT CONSULT ON THAT EITHER!

or maybe Munchies?

And your very loud typing

Unfortunately, she cannot speak French, just like you.

Merry, so merry...

Just maybe go and see something Christmassy or something.

THE SAME. OH. IT'S THE SAME.

- (Knocking) - Yeah.

You sure you don't mind me going without you?

It's great Scotch.

(Juliet) I am so happy to see you!

(Female DJ) 'It's almost enough to make you feel patriotic,

OK. Terry, I won't be long.

- Lovely, yes. - Thank you.

I'll make you so sure about it...

Well, we need Kate

And I can't breathe

Well, if it's not too much of an inconvenience.

Make my wish come true

"Come on and let it snow." Ouch.

We've never got friendly.

Well, erm, where do you live, for instance?

He now spends all the time in his room. I mean, he'll be up there now.

And then when he sometimes does come out, it's obvious he's been crying.

- Got to go. - Bye.

Let's, erm... move on, shall we?

'I think about the arrivals gate at Heathrow airport.

I don't want a lot for Christmas

Just be patient.

I hate Uncle Jamie!

(Girls) "Straw."

- (Sighing) OK, fine. - Thanks and, er, be nice.

Of course, if you want me to come over I will. Mm-hm.

Alex reminds me of.....

Shut up, Miss Dunkin' Donut 2003.

Good morning. I had an uncle called Terence.

What did I do? I made a papier-mâché lobster head.

none one is going to pick you if you don't cheer up

It can tear you up inside Ooh

Everyday at DCAA!

It tears my heart in two

I love you even when you're sick and look disgusting.

the great Mrs Jean Anderson.

Actually they’re not funny They’re art

(Wedding March becomes La Marseillaise)

- Hi, Sarah. - Hi, Karl.

Hmmm. No, Absolutely Not! We do not and didn't consult on that either

No, absolutely not! We didn't and do not consult on that either

(Man) 'Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world,

Normally, I'm really shy, takes me ages to get the courage up, so thank you.

So deep I can't sleep, I can't...

I think I've got it all figured out

I can safely say that is the worst record I've heard this century...

Excellent. Excellent. Perfect, keep that going.

It is chock-a-block full of puzzles It is chock-a-block full of puzzles

and we need Leo, and we need them now.

No. I realised that Christmas is the time to be with the people you love.

Yeah, you're still sickeningly handsome, whereas I look like my Aunt Mildred.

Try my lovely nuts?

Tell me I've got to know

So, what's the problem, Samuel?

Who do you have to screw round here to get a cup of tea and a biscuit?

- Before we run out of chances. - Who, me?

Don’t buy Noel Gallagher concert tickets Live near Wythenshawe Park and hear the entire concert for free

Absolutely not! We didn't And do not consult on that either

For God's sake, Ringo Starr married a Bond girl.

Worse than the total agony of being in love?

Yes, she's American.

- Nein! - Ja, darling!

A friend who bullies us is no longer a friend

Hi, guys. Hey, hey, hey. You all right?

(Portuguese) Maybe you could name one of the characters after me.

Po Po Po Po Power with Bearglove

Meat Loaf definitely got laid at least once.

I'm actually yours, with love. Your Robert Mueller

Er, bugger off, call me later.

Who do you have to screw around here To get a cuppa tea and a chocolate biscuit

So, let's go. We can definitely crack this.

And if you want more

Just any bar. Just your average American bar.

but you turn out to be the fucking love of my life.

It's a personalised felt-tip pen.

I'll have a look but I'm pretty sure I wiped it, so don't get any hopes up.

There was more than one lobster present at the birth of Jesus?

Nobody ought to be alone on Christmas Don't leave me alone

- Harry? - Sarah,

Oh, you were wonderful.

- But you wanted it giftwrapped. - I did but...

"BITS AND BOBS"

22 is alot of men, Daniel

I thought it was time I did.

All alone on Christmas Nobody ought to be alone on Christmas

Visions of sugarplums have disappeared...

God only knows what I'd be without you

It seems no matter what I do

And they called it...

I know my heart I know my heart can make you happy

Ah, right. Well, er...

so do you believe that by 2037 we will turn the new on gillard? yes i believe it, and by 2099 expect more taxes to bonk.

Chappel Roan is the Midwest lesbian who taught your cold english wife how to feel.

Er, either I could behave like a real rock'n'roll loser

Well, now, that was an interesting day.

Imagine your husband bought a gold necklace

Good King Wenceslas looked out

or, when I hang up,

- Oh, yeah, yeah, that is dodgy. - Hm.

(Sound turned down)

Not that Josh Groban crap again!

And what does she, he, feel about you?

'but I'm hoping for a late surge.