Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

(scattered applause)
And for those of you at home who aren't conscious
And where are the others? Wasn't this class bigger?
(laughs)
You get laughs from people who are drunk
That's money left on the table.
Stupid me, I thought the telethon was a good way for you
You should consider a sabbatical.
This was just... unexpected.
-Go vouch for my girl? -Done deal.
It's New York. Could be a gay hooker.
Now please, cut to the chase here.
-Well, then don't follow me. -We came in the same car.
invites you to join her for a chat with a few...
Hello and welcome to the telethon.
This is Mrs. Maisel, comedian.
You'll simply be overqualified dishwasher repairmen.
It means the world to us to have so many people care.
-She can't do that. -(chuckles) Ballsy.
tune in next year for our fourth annual
-It barely cuts cheese. -Truman didn't even say good-bye.
ABE: We should donate.
my TV-friendly material to,
Uh-huh.
Piece of cake.
-Oh, yeah. -What's his name? I forget.
He's kind of a jerk.
(door closes)
You hear about the big arthritis telethon on WNPO next Tuesday?
My phone's not ringing.
♪ That burst with charm ♪
-Whoopee! -(cheering and applause)
shouldn't be scarier than actual war.
How can you be so sure?
-(chuckles) A lot better. -(chuckles)
Yes.
A seltzer, please. Ice.
-You're exhausting. -(laughs)
-Could you all come with me to the telethon? -So... Dr. Benjamin.
to perform everyday tasks.
You're down for five minutes at 2150.
-Yeah. -Pop, this is a fortune.
Okay. You want to make this interesting?
-What was that? -Wrong number.
Why would she perform on this thing?
Come on, man, we've talked about this.
MIDGE: No, I'm not interested in the Encyclopedia Britannica,
60 grand?
You can't eat with the children.
(intro to "Pink Shoelaces" by The Chordettes plays)
Can't even what, my darling?
My refrigerator is not running, sir.
♪ We found you lying ♪
-MIDGE: Shy Baldwin. -MAN: Next!
And seven turned out to be dead!
♪ Your former glories and all the stories ♪
♪ Oh, your city lies in dust ♪
Can we start over? I really want to solve this.
a closet full of fat suits.
because Sophie's an asshole.
-DICKIE: I'd use a bucket at this point. -Hey.
Hope my wife stayed up for that. She'd love it.
If you get confused, just add the number 12
It is now.
♪ Children were running ♪
I'm a good guy. I'm still me.
(audience laughs)
It's 50% there.
-Con Ed? -Emphasis on the "Con."
(laughs) You are still a hoot.
Take your time,
Carry on.
Your race can have her.
Thank you for the music.
thank you. I started reading it once
always so far from the control room?
(applause)
You're interrupting my steam.
Whoa, whoa. Who took down Sophie?
-All right. -(laughter and applause)
What?