Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

You want some aspirin?

How did you find it? I mean, where did you find it?

- Okay, or don't. You know, yeah. - Oh, my God, I'm sorry.

These people earn 200 grand plus a year.

Babe, I am about the love.

Toilet paper guy! Toilet paper guy!

and somehow you neglect to tell me that,

- Really? - Yeah.

and I think you guys are really gonna, you know, hit it off.

Because, after all, he is the big survivor, indeed, the victor

- I was, wasn't I? - No.

"'Whose charms were broken if revealed'

So you're absolutely positive, 100%, that Emily is the very same woman

That's pathetic. It's so puny.

- Where are you? - I'm close by.

And he's thinking,

What do you mean?

getting married is the only thing left to do.

I can't have that, Hayes. I need you to sell five of them.

Twenty-nine and three-quarters.

The world will pardon my mush

- Let's think about this. - I'm not afraid of this.

- Sam Knowles. - Okay.

for the President of the United States of America,

And I'm working at a bookstore.

- Somebody had too much to drink. - No, I didn't.

- I've Got A Crush On You. - Every one of them.

from the Columbia Presbyterian emergency room. We have...

- an incredible, deep kiss. - Spare me the details.

So tell me about yourself. What's your deal? What do you aspire to?

"The boys' dorm is across the quad, their windows visible from ours.

Hey, come on, now. I just want you to come for a weekend.

You a Jehovah's Witness?

"From your loving father."

- I want you to come. - Oh, boy.

No, I didn't mean it like that.

- Advance team. - Yeah. How'd it go?

Now, this young man was deeply, deeply in love with his college sweetheart.

Put the picture back!

- Oh, God. - There he is!

Hold it! Stop. Stop right there!

but I just don't really have time for the pain.

She was on my exchange program at Cambridge,

- Really? - Yep.

Happy birthday, dear Will

Right here, I got a desk, and I got a list.

and you're completely obsessed with power and money.

So, we'll change together.

I know this is tough for you, but what are you thinking?

Very nice of you to come to our little shindig.

that the Vietnam War was just a terrible idea?

- So those are healthy cigarettes. - Something like that.

I slept with Charlie!

- And you. - Okay.

And I figure it'll take about nine months,

- There's the desk. - Look at that. Yeah.

Yeah, that's real mature. Where are you going?

I taught him everything he knows about flossing, and he flosses now!

'Cause I've got a crush, my baby, on...

- Where's Kelly? - She's right over there.

You know what I love?

Wall Street. No!

"It's the tongue in our heads!

I think you should keep it. You should read it when you're lonely.

Okay. Good night, Maya.

No, no. Don't eat it yet! Not till we get to our bench.

It's like when something is staring you in the face

Yeah. I know what you mean.

- What's he doing here? - Hello, Hampton.

Easiest 20 bucks I ever made.

Yeah, yeah, he did, and I am. Very, very happy.

Gonna meet you and Arthur in the restaurant.

That's interesting, coming from you, April.

More jobs, more money.

I'm sorry. I think I was just nervous to tell you.

- I told you I was dating someone. - Dating someone.

I'll take you out for dinner, for a birthday dinner.

"I've Got A Crush On You, Sweetie Pie"

Okay, you know what? I think we should stop now.

Well, sometimes they're apart for years, but they almost always find each other.

Great. Ask her out.

- How's Emily? - Emily.

- Jesus. - I'm kidding.

Well, I never welsh on a bet, so I'll tell you what.

That is a beautiful woman right there.

Well, at some point, we all make copies. Your time is now.

What does that mean? I don't know what that means.

You still have to tell me the story of why you fell in love with her.

Jesus. That's awful.

Well, I don't need a guy. I never really did.

The thing is...

What are you saying? That I don't need? That I don't have emotions?

Oh, please! Daddy.

Come on, you've been staring at that package for about a week now.

No. Game over. It's time for bed.

Yeah, that's funny, the toilet paper.

In your apartment?

So there's never been a guy, ever, that made you think, "This is it.

Go catch up to your mom, okay? All right, bye.

Put your coat on.

Probably because I'm stuck in a rut with this guy.