Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Poof, you're a puppeteer.

Malkovich's rise to fame

All of us. Celeste, Floris, you, me. Gary Sinise maybe.

how did you know it was me?

you wouldn't have a clue what to do with me.

Joe, did you get your coffee?!

You are late, my little cowboy.

Now, my friends. The time is now.

Well... it's just that I... I... I dream about you.

Okeydoke. They're covered in grease.

You're not a fag, are you?

- 'Cause I'm gonna be late for Malkovich now. - No.

Not everybody can be Derek Mantini.

Hi. I heard your voice.

and this was the sum total of my love.

Cut it out, you guys.

Sit up, okay? Just sit up. Just sit up.

Okay. Let's go. Come on.

We're gonna kill Maxine if you don't leave the body immediately!

the world was not built with me in mind.

and, um, I'd just like to thank God for giving us this opportunity

Behind the stubble and the too prominent brow

After dinner, I'll show you my puppets.

If there's anything that upsets me about it,

Damn, you're good.

Therefore, I shall make ye...

Now I'd like you to meet some friends.

I love you, Maxine.

do you know why our workplace has such low ceilings?

It's... It's the... I miss... I'm really John Malkovich.

so I'll be working a lot of late nights.

- My sweet, beautiful Lotte. - Oh!

but, 49 words for snow?

- Craig, honey, time to get up. - Lotte.

listen to Lester's sexual fantasies and drink carrot juice for a while.

I've never been looked at like this by a woman before.

Get outta my head It's my head

Me in leather. A harness, if you like.

I'm glad you're coming to realize that.

"I was so freaked out."

- Fuck off, Craig! - Doesn't it?

Do you think that it's kind of weird that John Malkovich has a portal?

But, Mr. Malkovich, sir, with all due respect,

Malkovich, Malkovich.

My name is Schwartz.

It's just a little mix-up with your secretary. My name is Craig Schwartz.

Well, thank you very much. I appreciate it.

Good afternoon, sir.

because it could have been her talking through me.

a reflection of ourselves, our frailties

You listen to me, asshole. I don't want your fucking money.

Ladies, I begin. I am the love god Eros.

Ouch. That is hot.

Charlie, this is Emily.

I have a cousin who's a retard.

So tell me, Lotte, can you understand a word I'm saying?

Lotte? Is that you?

You get these half-assed ideas, and then you do a half-assed job.

it is important that you learn a bit about the history of this famous floor.

but, rather, the ear of a kind man with a noble heart.

I don't know if maybe we should exploit it. You think?

Shut up! We're trying to think here.

Davey, it's Max.

doesn't have access to our product?

Where the fuck am I?

You fell in love with her first, Craig.

So where do you live and stuff?

And the funny thing is, Mr. Malkovich, my voice is probably

desperate humanity.

You're just... You're just

How public, like a frog

we'll smoke a joint,

business stuff,

I wanna try it.

It's my second choice, but it's wonderful. It's...

Now we're gettin' somewhere.

Sorry about that cunt at reception

Sure. Sure. No problemo.

to share our creative vision.

about the orientation film being bullshit.

Wet his pants so all could see!

You see, I've been very lonely