Chris vs. Donald - Get a Life [S01E13]

Hell no, Dad.

Well, if we're through shooting the bull, let's get to the beer.

I hate you.

After he saved your life, you're the scum of the earth.

As most of you probably know, I had to fire the boy that cuts our grass because I caught him stealing a power drill out of the garage.

Call Ripley.

Come on, why should I lift a finger to help him?

Hey, stop it.

You're ugly.

It's my turn to host the damn thing and I can't weasel out of it.

And that's why, just a few short months ago, when my minister needed some money for a new space heater for his trailer, I handed the guy ten bucks.

Go trash his piece of crap car.

I despise him.

Are you saying that Donald is gonna be here today?

Wait a second.

I just thought I'd say a quick adios before I head off on my whitewater rafting trip this weekend.

Mom, mom, you have to help me.

Do you know, I heard he wants six o'clock radio with just a butter knife and Elmer's glue.

It gives me great pleasure now to present this sterling silver trophy and a $50 savings bond to Donald.

Thanks for making an ass out of me.

Donald, don't jump.

Okay, if we're all done with that crap, I'll make this brief.

Otherwise, there could be disastrous results.

What did Donald think of next?

Yeah, you go first.